Don't Call Me Sweetheart

Shop Till You Drop

Chapter Song: Suit and Tie, Justin Timberlake

The next morning I stood outside of Colin's apartment and pounded my palms onto his door repeatedly.

"Yoohoo! Billy's here!" I called in a sing-song voice; quoting the movie, Billy Madison.

"Go away!" Colin shouted from the other side of the door. I rolled my eyes and pulled out the crudely drawn picture of eggs and bacon from my back pocket. Written on it was, "Breakfast at Tiffany's." I slid the drawing under his door and walked back into mine and Ally's apartment.

"Was he still sleeping?" Ally asked as she munched on a piece of toast. I sat down next to her at the table and grabbed a slice of bacon.

"No, just being lazy. But, I'm pretty sure he'll be here in 3...2..." I stopped when the door creaked open. "Now." Ally and I laughed as Colin stumbled in, hair a mess and wearing a pair of pajama pants that were on backwards. But, he obviously didn't care.

"Well, well, well. Karen Walker, I thought I smelled gin and regret." I said in my best Beverly Leslie impersonation.

"Enough with the quotes!" Colin exclaimed and plopped in the seat next to mine. I just chuckled and served him up a plate of breakfast foods.

"Eat up big boy, 'cause we've got a busy day ahead of us." I said, setting the plate down in front of him and going into the kitchen to get a glass of orange juice.

"Why?" He asked around a mouthful of food.

"We're going out, 'cause Ally's gonna be working on new sculptures and I don't want to bug her. Plus, you need a new suit for the auction." I explained, going back to the table and giving him his juice.

"I have a suit." He stated, chewing on a piece of bacon.

"That crappy rent-a-tux is not going to cut it." I snorted and shoveled some scrambled eggs into my mouth. Colin just sighed and drank down his orange juice.

"Fine, where are we going?" He questioned, scratching the back of his neck and yawning.

"No, no. I'm not telling." I replied, clearing away my plate and taking it into the kitchen.

"Why not?" Colin called, turning back in his chair.

"Because today you are not Colin Shea! You are Paige Ellison's doll that she's gonna dress up all pretty." I said, speaking in third person.

"Whoa! I'm not a doll, and I'm not gonna let you dress me up. I'm a grown man." He huffed in indignation.

"Yeah, yeah. Drink your juice, grown man." I muttered and walked past them to get changed in Ally's room. It was really our room now, we slept in her bed together and it was nice. Like a never ending sleepover.

I threw on a pair of well-worn jeans and a cream colored sweater. I ran a brush through my hair to get most of the knots out and I sprayed myself with some of my best perfume. When I went back into the living room it was just Ally sitting at the table. Colin came back in a few minutes later, still looking disheveled, but at least he put on normal clothes.

"Ok! You have fun with your freaky ass sculptures, we'll be back later today." I said to Ally and gave her a peck on the forehead. She waved as we left the apartment. Colin and I descended the stairs in silence and I checked my phone to see where the closest suit shop was.

"Ok, so Cuffs and Collars is over on Water street. Looks pretty nice, we can get your suit there." I said, reading the store's website.

"Sounds kinky." Colin murmured, stuffing his hands in his pockets.