Lost Boy, Stolen Memories

Chapter 17

Erin's POV

I think I'm dead, because I no longer feel any pain. So why can I feel Peter removing the dagger from my corpse? Why do I feel my chest rising and falling normally? Most importantly, why can I hear Colt calling my name perfectly clearly?

All this evidence points to me being alive still, but no one can survive a dagger right through the heart, not even in Neverland. I dare to open my eyes. There are no fluffy white clouds or angel choirs, just Neverland's landscape. What the hell?

I sit up, and there is no longer any pain, in fact all the bruises and cuts from last night have completely vanished. I am so hopelessly confused that I can't feel anything else, the question explodes from my mouth, "Can someone please explain to me what is going on here?"

"I volunteer," Peter says, "I just killed you, and then you professed your undying love to me, and then I barely saved your life by healing you. And yes, I can heal any wound that happens in Neverland. Just to save you some confusion: you're welcome."

I let what he just said roll around in my brain for a few seconds, and I come up with, "So what you're saying is, you gave me a fatal wound to see if I would still love you if you killed me, and like the sick person you are, you brought me back into the torture that has become my life?"

"You could put it that way, yes," Peter says cruelly.

I don't know why, but this remark sends me off the edge, "I take it back! I can't possibly love you after you did something like that! That scared, lost boy without any memories who loved me is dead! You aren't and never will be him again! I FUCKING HATE YOU PETER PAN!!!"

This wipes that idiot smirk right off his face, he gapes at me, all the shock he's feeling registers on his face. I feel so satisfied to see him like this. Since he's caught off guard, I decide to experiment.

I squeeze my eyes shut and imagine myself free from this cage again. The pain returns, and it is almost unbearable. I push through it, willing the image to become real, not caring if my brain explodes in the process. Once I get past the initial pain, it isn't that bad. I open my eyes and find that the cage has been obliterated, and I'm flying.

Flying, on my own, no wire, no shadow, nothing. It's the best I've ever felt.

And to make it feel even better, Peter is staring at me, dumbfounded. He has no idea what to make of this, but I do. I have overcome his barrier. I have total control over Neverland's magic, and it feels amazing, better than love. I now understand why Peter is incapable of loving, its because he didn't need it. Control is so much better than love.

I can do whatever I want now, I could kill Peter. As appealing as that sounds, though, I can't let him escape that easily. Instead, I just picture him plummeting to the ground, and he does, still with that shocked expression on his face.

Instead of watching him suffer, I start to fly upwards, far up into the clouds. This is the highest I have ever been in my life. The majority of me is celebrating that fact, but a small fraction of my being is afraid that it's the highest I will ever be, and that the highest highs are often followed by the lowest lows. But I have to enjoy this feeling while I still have a grasp of it.