Bad ass

Loving someone who hates life

"3,2,1 HAPPY NEW YEARS'' Everyone screamed at the top of their lungs, while sharing kisses(both intimate and friendly), and hugs.

I hugged my knees to my chest, not caring if I am flashing my privates. "you should really put your legs down, i can see your coca" someone commented.

I shrugged and turned around to see who spoke to me, but saw no one. After about 5minutes of basically flashing everyone at party, i decided to walk around, struggling ab it on the getting up pat.

After stabilizing myself i regretted wearing 4inch stilettos to an all night party. I focused so hard on trying to keep my balance that i bumped into what i thought was a wall.

"Watch where you're going" A disturbingly hot deep voice warned " sorry" I mumbled keeping my head down. 

"You better be" he threatened bumping me again to get around me.

I've only been at this party for 25minutes and already i get noticed for what i really am...a loser.

I thought by pounding on heavy makeup that no one will notice that i didn't belong. The only reason why i got invited to this party is because of who my cousin is.

My cousin is one of the most popular cheerleaders at my school. It kinda surprised me that her security even let me in. But who cares now I'm in.

I walked around slowly trying to fit in or at least blend in to look as if i was one of Cania's(my cousin) slutty friends.

A guy actually offered me a drink and i proudly accepted, smiling at him

my smile was abruptly  turned into a frown when someone snatched the cup out of my hand. "what are you doing here Nadia?'' Cania sneered looking me up and down "you look hideous" small giggles erupted from behind me.

"Well maybe you're just jealous" i wanted to say but held my tongue. Her prosthetic orange eyes looked at me expectantly. "well, you still didn't answer my question'' i shook my head "yeah sorry i thought i was invited" i basically whispered.

She shook her head making it seem as if she was disapointed "Oh, Nadia, Nadia poor you sweetheart listen go home and cuddle with Mr. and Mrs Lovas bear."

That was supposed to be a secret" I sneered Mr.and Mrs. Lovas bear is my two favorite build-a-bears.''oops, my bad hunny, look just go home, losers aren't allowed" She barked and everyone bust out into laughter. Tears flooded my eyes and i ran "say hi to Tyler" i heard her say over the laughing. I ran all the way to my car struggling for my keys as i did so.

It took me 5 tries to get my door open. When i did, i couldn't help but replay the scene in my head over and over.

"losers aren't allowed" how can she say that to me, just yesterday she was hugging me saying how much she loves me, and how much she wouldn't let anyone hurt my feelings.

"She is such a fake inconsiderate LIAR!" I screamed through cloud of tears.

I felt and enjoyed the warm tears as they clouded my vision making it hard to see.Maybe this is a sign that my life needs to end. Taking strong breaths, I finally pulled into my drive way. We would be border line poor if it wasn't for My aunt and uncle and Cania's mom and dad.

They provided all that me, my mom, and Tyler have today. my mom swears that she doesn't need any of the money i offer her from my job at hot topic.

She swears  that she has everything under control.She thinks that i don't know that she is struggling so much that she considers killing herself even more than me.

I walk into our small 2 storie house rubbing the tears off of my face and drooping my keys on the counter,I walked upstairs to the faint smell of smoke and gasped and ran into my younger brother's,Tyler, room. 

"Monkey?" i searched using his nick name ''are you in here?" i walked further into the room and bumped into his small figure curled up on the wall. "Mommy wants to hurt me" he cried hugging my ankles. 

"What did she do?'' I responded Angrily picking him up, ignoring his heaviness. 

he stuck his arm out and rolled up his sleeves exposing five razor marks looking bloody and swollen. I gasped and sat him on the edge of his bed and told him to stay.

I closed his door tightly and walked over to my moms room, clouds of smoke surrounding me making it hard to breath, and feel as if strong arms were tightly trying to squeeze me in place.

Walking slowly, i opened her door stiffly, while pulling the hem of my dress down knowing that her drug dealer boyfriend and his usual friend would be there smoking and in hailing cocaine with my mother to keep her company.

"Happy new years sweetie" my mother says running to hug me with a cigarette butt in her fingers.I held back a cough and looked over her shoulders at her boyfriend,Ralph, as he looked me up and down slowly taking my figure in. Stopping shortly at the edge of my dress, in between my legs and continuing down my short legs extended by stilettos.

"Happy new years Nadia '' spoke up letting his red streaked eyes make contact with my deep brown ones. I shuddered and focused my attention back onto my mother as she tried uselessly pulling my dress down.

"Why did you cut Tyler, mom?" I slapped her cold hands away from my dress. "did he tell you that ?" She laughed. I nodded a tight yes as she shrugged. "The kid loves to play with knives" 

I shook my head "Tyler doesn't play with knives mother, he's four he barely uses a fork to eat with, Why would he play with knives?" She shrugged again which really pissed me off. "Tell me the truth Alyssia!" I screamed at her. 

She flinched only slightly before turning her eyes to my face with a scorn. "what the fuck did you just call me Nadia?!?!" I backed away slightly. She looked and sounded like Cania when she did that. 

"Alyssia" I whispered putting my head down. Somehow I felt it coming coming. I knew it was going to happen, and it was soo fast i didn't have time to block it. 

I fell to the ground hard clutching the spot on my face where my mother smacked me. "Me and Tyler are leaving you and i hope you get the help you need because you seriously are a sick person."

i got up slowly facing "You're nothing but slut" she scowled "look at how short your dress is! All you want is attention, You little Bitch!" For the second time today the background people laughed loudly, this time at the words my mother was saying. 

"Take Tyler and leave, like i care i was just trying to toughen him up."

"he's four mother" i responded through clinched teeth. She snikered "And?" I shook my head slowly walking out the room.

"go to hell" I screamed just short going back into Tyler's room trails laughter following close behind me.

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ok i really hope you guys like this story...ive worked really hard on this one. I have like deleted my  stories like 5 times already because i didnt like overall how they were all turning out to all end up soo BORING.... gosh you have no idea how painfull it is when you have serious writers block its like an actuall dieses lol.

So any ways ill like try to upload a chapter every day...and i promise that theyll get longer. If i dont upload a chapter a day or two or even a week just know that either im taking very important tests....going prom shopping or just really tired....School is a drag ughhh sooo any ways i can go on and on lol comment, vote, and fan pleasse

love Ali<3