IRL: Free Guy: Keys and Mills

Programmed Babies or Programmer's Babies?

"So, I have a serious question," was Mouser's prelude to what would be a horrific conversation.

"Shoot," Millie McKey said absent-mindedly, absolutely oblivious to the disaster she was giving way to. Damage control forces said afterward they'd never seen anything like it. 

"When am I getting nephews and nieces and what form are they gonna come in? Skin and bone or pixelized?"

Millie choked on her coffee and swiveled in her chair to meet Mouser's gaze. She gave Keys a quick glance. Despite having been "Mrs. Millie McKey" for a year now, she still called him Keys. A bit perplexing to explain to people they talked to. Throw in his social awkwardness and things just got more complicated. But to her, he would always be Keys and to him, she would always be Mills. He was still in "trance-mode." It was this deep, trance-like state he fell into when he was knee-deep in coding. The first time he told her about it, she had laughed in his face. Until it actually happened and she was wishing she had paid more attention to what he said about how to wake him up. Now that they were married, it was easy. She just had to kiss him.

Mouse continued to wear an insistent expression. He wanted answers. But there was absolutely no way she could fight this one on her own. She held up her index finger towards him, a silent signal to give her one moment.

She stood and slid to Keys's side. She watched his keyboard stroke for a few minutes, mesmerized. Then she planted one hand on the table, one on the back of his chair, slid her face in between him and the keyboard and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. She backed away, watching him blink a few times, reorienting himself. Catching sight of her, he said, "Yeah babe?"

She blushed. She had told him not to call her that. But secretly she liked it. 

"Ug, get a room. In fact, that would answer my question easy-peasy," came Mouser's voice from the other end of the room. Keys, though he had known Mouser was there at the beginning, had to allow himself to register his voice.

"Well, excuse me man for being affectionate towards my wife." Once again, she found herself thrilling from head to toe. She'd never, in a million years, imagined anyone, in general, being able to say that. She'd never given into the hope that in a million years, she would get to call herself some guy's wife. But she did now and she didn't have to wait a million years. Better yet, it wasn't just some guy. It was Keys."

"Back to my question," Mouser's voice broke through once again, and she shuddered in anticipation of what was coming. "When am I getting nephews and nieces and in what form will they come in? Skin and bones or pixelized?"

Keys gave him a look that read, are you kidding me? "Dude. Are you serious right now?"

"As serious as a heart-attack baby."

"Oh my gosh," was his response as Millie hid her face in her hands.

"Why are y'all being so frazzled. I think considering that you fell in love through pixels, got engaged through pixels, and held a second wedding ceremony through pixels just so Blue Shirt Guy could be there, which is still weird as heck, I don't care what you say, that it is fair for me to ask whether I'm going to have to accept that my future nephews and nieces will be pixelized AI."

"One," Keys began, Millie internally and forever grateful that he took the lead on this one, "Dude, really pushing it with that question. Two, who died and made you uncle? But three, I am 97.6% sure that our future children will be as real as it gets."

"Dude," came Mouser's counter, "don't deny it, it's a relevant question. Um, last I checked, you guys are outcasts from your families any way so the McKeys jr.'s will need an uncle. Not to mention all the help they can get from a cool person since both their parents are nerds."