How to Romanticize Your Life

Why Did You do This?

*Author's Note: It's written in first person, but it doesn't mean it happened to me, if I ever write a personal memoir, I'll let you know. :) *

It all happened so suddenly, I can't explain it, but it happened, it's here plaguing my mind and breaking down my walls.

Out of the majority of the people I know, I'm one of those rare people with strong morals and a real love and belief for my religion. So you can imagine my surprise when she came in.

Just to let you know, I'm a girl, a teenager, I'm in that awkward stage where most people are still trying to figure themselves out; but I've never been like most kids, most of the things kids went through at the age of 15, I experienced when I was 12-13 -but I guess that doesn't mean I was free from experiencing this nightmare.

I felt... Something -something strange, and beautiful, and seductive. The wondrous cacophony of light-ecstatic sighs were heard in every corner of my advanced and realistic mind when that marvelous body was defined by the decent -but curve hugging shirts. Her beautiful smile and golden hair will fill my mind and haunt me throughout the rest of the day, and I found my self craving just another look of her delicate face.

And I hate myself for it.

Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against gay people, my best friend is bi-sexual and some of my other friends are gay and I love them. The problem is, that I have a belief, I have a faith, and if I honestly didn't believe or at least doubted my belief then I would have no problem. But I love my faith, I have faith and I truly believe that my beliefs are true, if my homosexual friends can understand and respect my belief, I think you could do the same.

So here I am, confused, and I know it's just a phase, at least, I hope it is -but it hurts, because I don't know what to do. She's dating a boy, and when I found that out my feelings left, until she talked to me and told me she actually didn't really even liked him that much, she screwed up there big time. And she is the type of girl that would probably date a girl to see what happens, so if she ever found out, or ever maybe-even-might-somehow- feel something for me sometime, I don't think I'd be able to resist.

Violette is my forbidden fruit, my gorgeous, tantalizing, inviting demon, she is my downfall.

And I think I like her... Too much to say no.