The Doctor & The 13 Reasons Why

Chapter 10: 13 Reasons Why (Reasons 6-8)

Hannah Baker: He brought Zach and some of his jock friends.

Hannah Baker (Tape): And, again, you were funny, Marcus. And I thought maybe... just maybe it was going to be all right.

Hannah Baker: That's when I realized that he only wanted to get with me as he was feeling up my leg and was trying to get into my skirt. I pushed him off me and he just yells "What the fuck?" at me in front of everyone. His jock friends were just laughing. He then tells me that he thought I was easy.

Hannah Baker (Tape): I couldn't move. I couldn't get up and leave or scream. Anything would have been better than sitting there thinking that somehow this was my fault. Thinking I'd be alone the rest of my life. But through it all... you want to believe there are good guys in this world. I knew there were. Fun fact. I did some research on tombstones the other day. Or, more specifically, on epitaphs on tombstones. The best one I could find was by this writer called Henry Charles Bukowski, Jr. On his tombstone, he has engraved the picture of a boxer... and beneath the boxer, two simple words: "Don't try." I wonder what will be on mine.

Clay Jensen: Marcus is a fucking asshole. I should've just told you about my Dollar Valentine.

Hannah Baker: It's not your fault, Clay.

Clay Jensen: I can't imagine you, all alone in that restaurant with all eyes on you.

Hannah Baker: After they all left, Zach came back. Hey just sat there and let me ignore him and he took care of the bill. He tried to cheer me up.

Clay Jensen: Why would he try to cheer you up? He's one of them.

Hannah Baker: You're about to find out.

Clay Jensen: Tape 7.

The Doctor inserts tape 7 and press play.

Hannah Baker (Tape): You're going to tell me this one's no big deal... but let me tell you about being lonely. Humans are a social species. We rely on connections to survive. Even the most basic social interactions help keep us alive. Statistics prove the subjective feeling of loneliness can increase the likelihood of premature death by 26%. If it sounds like I'm quoting from a school textbook... I am. Too bad nobody bothered to read it. And let me tell you... there's all kinds of ways to feel lonely. I'm not talking the garden variety lonely in a crowd lonely. That's everyone, every day. And it's not that "when will I find love" kind of lonely. Or that "the popular kids are mean to me" kind of lonely. The popular kids are always mean. That's how they get popular. I know. Ironic. Old news. The kind of lonely I'm talking about is when you feel you've got nothing left. Nothing. And no one. Like you're drowning, and no one will throw you a line. Well, when the subject of this tape worked his sneaky magic... that's how I was feeling. And when you're that kind of lonely, you reach for anything... no matter how silly it may seem. And communications class could be supremely silly... as you know.

The Doctor: You're telling me.

Hannah Baker (Tape): Sometimes the silly things can mean more than anyone knows. We all need it. Human contact. And communications class, crazy as it was, was human contact for me. Until someone in that class cut my lifeline... someone who is known for being sweet. I'll tell you who it is... but you're going to have to wait. Just like I did. I'm going to play mind games with you, just like you played with me. It happened after Valentine's Day... when you really feel that lack of human contact. Especially when you make contact with the wrong human. That's a whole new level of lonely. But through it all... you still want to believe there are good guys in the world. You were kind that night. You just sat there, letting me ignore you... until it was almost comical. You were so sweet. Just like Kat said, once upon a time. So sweet. Well, welcome to your tape, Zach.