Worth The Shot

Rooftop Vigil

Antonio lay limply on the table, bawling and exhausted.

"It's okay, buddy. I got you," Camilo tearfully whispered, cradling Antonio in a secure embrace. Antonio's tiny hands fisted around Camilo's ruana like a lifeline. Breathing shakily, Camilo fiercely promised,  "It's okay. I got you. You're okay."

You tightly closed your eyes, crying softly. It's over now. He's gonna make it.

"Abuela? I'm back, I-" Felix's face fell as his eyes lighted on Antonio and Camilo. "No, no, Tonito," he gasped, dismayed. He stumbled over to the table and protectively scooped Antonio and Camilo into his arms.

Camilo shuddered with a sob and leaned into his father's chest, still holding Antonio.

An hour later, Antonio was safely stored in his jungle room, resting. You numbly weaved through the hallway to Casita's open window.

"Casita," you murmured, hugging your arms together. "Can you get me to the roof? I- I need to get out." Casita sympathetically creaked its floorboards and popped out stairsteps.

You crept up the rough steps, collapsing on Casita's roof. The memory of Antonio's screams dug sharp claws into your brain. He shouldn't have had to go through that. He's so young.

A tangerine sunset glowed in the sky, reflecting a warm, yellow outline on painted wisps of clouds. I wish I could fly into the colors and never come back.

A shuddering breath to your left startled you. I'm not alone up here.

Camilo huddled in a ball, curled in on himself as if cowering from a terrifying beast. He slouched with a broken lifelessness, his face hidden against his knees.

"Hey," Camilo murmured, lifting his head to acknowledge you. His hazel eyes hung dully, rimmed with red.

"Sorry," you uncomfortably apologized, scooting away from him. You edged toward Casita's makeshift ladder. "I didn't know you were up here." I should leave him alone. We're not on great terms right now.

"Wait," Camilo strained, his voice cracking. His disheveled curls flopped forward as he hesitantly gazed at the uneven rooftop shingles. "I-I know this isn't fair for me to ask. But don't leave me alone. Please."

With a stab of sympathy, Your resolve to leave melted like the golden watercolor swirls in the sky.

"Alright," you quietly consented. "I'll stay."

Camilo gratefully blinked, sweeping tears off of his face with the back of his hand. "You don't have to say anything. Just be here."

You eddied closer to Camilo, silently gazing out at the deep, orange sky.

A wave of peace settled over you like glittering gold dust. You could say anything you wanted, or nothing at all. A million poetic phrases lingered in your head, but somehow the smooth silence meant more than words ever could.

Camilo dropped his head back into his curled cocoon, holding his knees tighter. His dark hair hung from his head as he collapsed in on himself, hiding his face from his own mistakes and grief.

"Don't do that," you gently nudged him. "You'll miss the sunset."

"Are you a sunset person?" Camilo tiredly glanced up at you with a quiet smile.

"Everyone's a sunset person," you confidently confirmed, rocking back to lean on your hands. You admired the dark red tint that frosted the orange sky as the sun drowsily drifted lower. "If you focus on the sky, everything else feels small."

"Okay," Camilo chuckled, regarding you with adoring amusement.

"Focus on the sunset, not me," you lightly chided, pushing Camilo's chin to face the sky with two fingers.

"Not much of a difference," Camilo shrugged. He released a sigh, as if exhaling his melancholy emotions into the sunset.

"I miss you." He suddenly mumbled, risking a glance at you with vulnerable, hazel eyes.

"Don't. I'm right here," you breathed, lightly relaxing your head onto Camilo's shoulder.

Camilo blinked, bewildered. He frowned at your gesture of forgiveness. "I don't deserve you, (y/n)."

"Do you think you're a bad person, Camilo?"

"Yes," he immediately whispered, his dark eyebrows carefully furrowing. "I hit you. I'm violent and emotional. I held down Antonio."

"No. I don't believe that."

"Well, maybe you should."

"Maybe you should forgive yourself."

"I- I can't do that, (y/n)," he muttered, glancing away. "I shouldn't even be alone with you right now."

"Would you ever hit me again?"

"I'd die first," he solemnly said like an oath.

"Don't die," you protested, nuzzling into his shoulder. "Let's try again. I'm gonna trust you. Don't let me down."

"I won't. I promise I won't," Camilo murmured, resting his cheek on top of your head. His warm breaths puffed against your hair. The dim sunset light glowed against his eyelids like a gentle candle.

Alone on the roof, you snuggled into Camilo's side.

And like a nostalgic photograph, you memorized that moment and prayed it would last forever.