Misunderstood

Testing Limits

That amazing feeling fell quickly.

I’m shocked I allowed you to forget!

“I’m not going to let the past get to me now, no matter how much it hurts.”

Sure you will. Oh wait, I’m you. You’re allowing yourself to become conflicted.

“Let me rephrase; I’m not going to let you get to me now, no matter how much it hurts.”

All the more of a challenge for me.

Pretending to be oblivious was easy. I grabbed my backpack from the corner of my bedroom; the dust build-up causing me to sneeze. I pulled the summer bin out from under my bed and scavenged through the numerous tank tops and swimsuits. All hope would have been lost if I hadn’t found my favorite black bikini. Shoving that as well as a towel into the old backpack, trudged out of my room in a hurry. My keys sat on the hook next to the garage door in the kitchen, barely touched since the school season ended.

I stared at them for a brief second before taking them with me. The last time I used them was the drive to the beach with Destin earlier this summer. It’s been two months. I’ve been in my house ever since.

I’m a better influence than I give myself credit for…

“Shut up.” I snapped. Fighting the urge to run back inside, I jogged out to my jeep and climbed in quickly. With a shaky hand, I put the key in the ignition and tossed my backpack in the back seat.

“Imagine that, Cole. You’re going to the beach.” I laughed at myself. The trees passed by like they usually did, their colors almost distracting to me. I narrowed my view to the road ahead of me. Not even a second went by before I plugged my IPod into the car. In an instant the vehicle was submerged with vocals by Three Days Grace, Trapt, Stone Sour, Shinedown, and Puddle of Mudd, their rhythms so automatic to me it seemed normal for a moment. Things change, however. I became distant with even my own activities. They only reminded me of him. Hell, even this music reminded me of him.

This is truly becoming way too easy.

I shut the music off in an instant. “Why do you have to ruin my fun?” I asked desperately.

Because it’s fun to ruin yours.

“I’ve noticed.” I sighed as I slowly turned the music back up. “Besides, I’ve known these bands much longer than I’ve known Destin.”

That may be so, but you introduced them to him. I don’t recall him ever listening to any of his artists once you showed him your genre of music. It’s like he meshed his way into your life.

“Again, that’s a valid argument. I, however, have memories of these bands before Destin knew them.”

Perhaps, but not as many.

“Shut up.” A few minutes went by, and then I saw it. The glorious Lake Michigan. Excitement was building up as I edged closer and closer to the sandy escape. I looked at the clock.

“Excellent, it’s only 8.” As I reached the shoreline, my jaw dropped. Not a single parking space was open. “Are you kidding me?!”

The sun stared me down as I drove back and forth through the packed parking lot. I reached for my ray bans in the glove box, but they’ve seemed to disappear. “Fantastic.”

20 minutes went by before an older couple pulled out of the parking lot in front of me, leaving a spot open. Like a hobo after his rations, I sped into the empty space. I giggled as a few drivers behind me gave me dirty looks and the finger.