Going Your Own Way, but with Magic

Chapter 6

Water is much harder to pin down than fire. It's evasive. I know, no shit, it's water. Water is nourishing and life-giving and all that, but it's oddly ruthless. Fire is passion and love and hate and all that. I understand it. Water sort of kills you or saves you and doesn't care which. I can't get a grip on something so completely impersonal. I clear my mind, I feel the power, water appears for a second but always slips through my fingers. Multiple times I scream in frustration. Properly scream, high and inhuman. I discover that I like screaming. It uses all my emotion and leaves me empty.

I nearly give up on water. Even my desire to spite those men is a weak motivator. My word for water is Ell. Not blue, I'm not that bad. In the brief moments I have felt water at the edge of my power, it has been Ell. Fire is Red and water is Ell. I'll have a spell book soon enough. Oh my god, I could have a spell book. The thought gives me strength to keep going.

It's the last attempt of an infuriating day. I lie down with my eyes shut. Clearing my mind has become almost routine. No wants no needs no hopes no dreams. Stop being a person and become a vessel for magic. Be aware of nothing but the ring. Think of nothing, but don't let your focus drift for a second. Water isn't a rush of power, like fire. It gathers slowly, and when I feel it I almost ruin everything by jumping up in excitement. I tentatively reach out. It doesn't fight like fire does. It taps. So I don't fight it, I move with it. I say the word almost as an afterthought. It sounds very far away. I open my eyes in time fire a thin sheet of water to fall over me. It's clear and icy cold and I want to shout with joy. So I do. The shout comes out hoarse, but the joy is conveyed. I summoned water. God, this whole magic thing really never gets old.

I am being followed. Followed everywhere. I am never alone. I am being quite dramatic, because the thing that is following me is a mouse. I'm not even sure if it's the same mouse, it's a fairly nondescript brown, but I have a feeling. And I don't have any food on me, I've checked. This mouse is following me. I've never had a Cinderella-type affinity with animals. I've never really had a regular type affinity with animals. Too much mess, too many claws. But even I have to admit that the mouse is cute. A ragged kind of cute, but cute all the same. And way friendlier than mice should be. I don't know much about animal behaviour, but I'm pretty sure mice don't keep trying to jump into people's bags. It fell asleep in my hand once, casual as anything. If I restart the Black Death I'm sorry. I've started calling it Daphne. Maybe that's a dumb name for a mouse, but I didn't run away from home to be told what to call my random mouse/stalker/pet.

The idea of a familiar comes on slowly. I like mice. I like this mouse. It sometimes makes cute sneezing sounds. Mice take care of themselves, and they're clever. They're pretty much universally hated but that doesn't stop them surviving. Anyway, I'm not getting rid of Daphne whatever I do.

"How about it, Daphne? Want to become a witch's mouse? Granted, I'm not a very good witch yet, but I'm getting better. Sound good?" Daphne gives me a look of utter disdain and goes back to sleep. I am sitting in a field, talking to a mouse. "So, you're sure? I don't want to bond us together without some indication. Would you like to be a magic pet? I'll feed you?" I don't know what I'm waiting for. A thumbs up, maybe? Daphne shifts to the side a little. In the absence of her starting to talk, I take that for a yes.

For many days I stood in a field feeling stupid. No longer. Today, I stand in a field looking stupid holding a mouse. Character development. I think I need to pour a bit of my power into her, but my power tends to be quite flammable. Setting a mouse on fire is a bad idea. I clear my mind and reach for the power (bloody cold this time), but I don't twist it. I become aware of Daphne, which isn't hard because she's finally woken up and is sniffing my fingers. I try to transfer tiny pieces of the power, about the size of her paw. I have no idea what I'm doing. Eventually, she starts to glow. Only a bit, but mice shouldn't be glowing. I let the power drain. Great, I made a radioactive mouse. When the ring is a normal temperature, I am relieved to watch the glow slowly leaving. When she goes back to relative normalcy, she falls asleep again. Okay. The mouse is not on fire, or turned into an evil mutant creature. That's something.

It's when I'm walking home that I notice it. It's a sort of awareness, subtle but always there. A small, mouse shape awareness lingering on the edges of my consciousness. And, with enough effort, I can see what she sees. My vision spins and then everything goes massive and blurry. I nearly throw up on the pavement the first time. It's like vertigo, seasickness and a migraine all in one. No one told me magic would hurt. Daphne has fallen asleep in my pocket, leaving me with lots of time to process how I have a pet mouse now. I have a pet mouse now. Because this the perfect time in my life for extra responsibilities. I don't even know what mice eat. I have magically bonded myself to a mouse without thinking about where it's going to sleep. Nice one, me. Although it is giving me an insight into the crazy cat/dog/horse people. If anything happens to Daphne I will go an a murderous rampage. I have a pet mouse now. Wonderful.

"Daphne, love, when we're inside you have to be quiet. People here would as soon kill you as look at you." Daphne does not look shocked by this dire proclamation. She curls up and falls asleep.