emmylou | natasha romanoff

two.

"She didn't say anything on the tapes," Fury states and Natasha was aware of that. She swore Kennedy to secrecy. Though a part of her always yearned and longed that Kennedy would tell someone. That she would explode the whole Red Room operation by uttering Natasha's secret, but it never happened, and Natasha wasn't even mad about it.

"I know," Natasha says softly, finally bringing her eyes to look at the director, "I held on to her though. I told her that someday I'd get out and she told me that she'd stay in Ohio till I did."

"Seems she kept that promise as well," Fury tells her, and Natasha nods her head. Kennedy, someone who had become a figment of her imagination rather than a real person was right where she left her and for some reason that fact scared her.

"I'm giving you some time off Agent Romanoff," Fury says, and Natasha's eyes snap up at him.

"For what?"

"To go to Ohio," he says, "If I'm being honest, you've seemed a little – off since the attack on New York. You've passed your psych evals, but I can tell when my agents aren't performing to the best of their ability. You haven't."

"Ouch," Natasha says, but she knew he wasn't wrong. It wasn't as though she failed to complete missions, but rather small mistakes here and there. To anyone else they'd go unnoticed, but Fury noticed everything.

"You've been married to your job, Romanoff but maybe you should take a page out of Barton's book."

"You're suggesting that I settle down and get married?"

"I'm suggesting that you reconnect with an old friend. This job – it takes a lot out of people. Given your past, you could use a little civilian connection. If this Kennedy Allen was your best friend once upon a time, then maybe she's that thing you need."

"She knew me before," Natasha says shaking her head, "I was technically still a civilian when I knew her. Now I'm on several watchlists around the world."

"I'm still forcing you to take time off," Fury tells her as he looks at the tapes, "Spend it how you'd like, but I do think reuniting with an old friend, especially one as loyal as little Kennedy Allen would be good for you."

Natasha knew better than to argue with him.

"Right," Natasha says.

Fury holds the box of tapes out to her and Natasha eyes them before taking them.

"Give the tapes a watch," he tells her, "I'm sure it'll change whatever decision you've settled on."

Natasha nods her head. She heads toward the door and opens it she spares Nick one last look before heading into the hallway of the SHIELD headquarters. Natasha doesn't even make it three feet from Nick's office before Clint finds her and falls into step with her.

"New mission?" Clint asks.

"Actually, I've been benched," Natasha tells him, and Clint lets out a sound resembling a scoff and a laugh.

"You're joking."

Natasha shakes her head, "Apparently I've been off."

"I mean you have, but I wasn't going to say anything," Clint tells her. Natasha doesn't respond as she keeps walking. Clint nods at the box, "What's that?"

"Interrogation tapes from 1995," Natasha answers, "They're of my childhood best friend."

"You had a friend?" Clint asks and this time Natasha rolls her eyes.

"Her name is Kennedy Allen. We met when I was doing a mission in Ohio. I was eight, Kennedy lived next door so to fit in I befriended her. At first it was because of the mission but we stayed there for years and –" she trails off shaking her head.