Strangers at a distance.

1.

Here I was, jumping off my balcony.

Yeah, a lot of things have led up to it and this was long overdue. The wind is flowing through my hair, and it feels amazing, nearly enough to persuade me not to do it. When I look down, I see the cars speeding by, completely oblivious to what is about to happen in a matter of seconds.

And what's the reason for this? To be honest, there are far too many to count. This was only a last resort, and I'd always wanted to know what it's like to fly.

When I think back to my family, I realize that they were pretty supportive, but it was just... not enough. I didn't have anyone who truly supported me; instead, they provided the standard support, such as "that's okay, it happens to everyone." They didn't even consider the possibility that I wasn't 'everyone.'

And friends, well let's not even talk about that. They did make me happy until they found a new person to laugh about. Friendships meant a lot to me, I never gave up looking for a new friend, even if I was really introverted, I still always reached out first because I was simply desperate. still, none of that worked.

Nothing worked.

And that's why it reached this point. I thought I'll be able to live through reading books about friendship, watching movies about happy families, and live through my life but at the end of it all, on the last page of the book or at the ending of the movie, I was still alone.

Everyone wants to know what your greatest fear is. Some people say it's because of heights or insects, but I believe it's because of loneliness. It's the worst feeling; it's as if you're slowly dying and your mind is rotting or, at least, that's how it feels to me.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath one final time as I look back at my empty house. It's completely silent; the only sound is the blowing wind, which I find calming

When I open my eyes, I find a girl standing on her balcony, directly across from my building. For a split second, we connect gazes, and I realize she's doing the same thing as me. I cannot take my eyes off her though. She is utterly beautiful.

I remember seeing her a few times because we lived across from each other. Once I remember seeing her with headphones on and she was staring at the sky, trying to find even one star in the city lights. I had pointed at the one star that was in the sky and she looked at it and then she smiled at me. I will never forget that smile.

We were close but not close enough to talk and hear each other.

We both just stare at each other because, well, who's gonna go first?

I see tears in her gorgeous eyes since she's not that far away. I don't want her to lose her life. But I'd like to lose mine. Will she leave if I don't do it? Should I get down just for her sake?

Maybe I can last one more day. I don't want her to die. Even though I don't really know her.

Should I?

No.

Maybe?

I don't know.

I think she senses my doubt because she nods her head up and down very slowly, telling me that nothing will stop her.

Well.

I slowly get down from the chair I was standing on since the balcony wall was very high and show her that I am not going to do it, hoping that she would get down too.

She gives me a look full of confusion and now I know that she is considering not doing it too.

I'm glad.

I sign with my hand showing a high five sign, telling her to wait. I quickly run inside my house and get a pen and paper.

When I go out again, she's just staring at me with a blank face.

I write something on it and show it to her. I hope she understands my handwriting. She looks at what I've written and tears start falling from her eyes again.

So, it's working.

I turn the page around and write another thing but by the time I show it to her, she is already down the chair she was standing on.

To say I was relieved would be an understatement. I don't know what was it about her, but I didn't want her to go through what I was.

We both just stare at each other because we literally, saved each other's life.

I have no idea what I'm gonna do because, I am not going to last long and I know that once I'm gone, she will come right behind.

Well, at least for now she's safe.