a small story on a relationship that sparked years ago ending terribly in heart break and hate, years latter reunited, but here's the catch, he's a world wide known actor, and she's working part time in a shitty book store.
photos from pinterest, ma...
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pulling my stocking up cursing when I tare a rip in them, but they're my only pair so I keep them on, I step into a small skirt and a white cotton shirt, I wear my old Mary Janes and add a light makeup.
it's around 11, it stoped snowing New York is left with a light coat blanket of snow, it's quite beautiful outside, I check my phone seeing Timothèe wants to meet me at mine, which I was hesitant about, but eventually I just couldn't care too much.
i sit on my bed, quietly, thinking.
Was this a good idea? Typical of me to torture myself for years over this man then as soon as I get the chance to spend time with him I run to him.
that's love for you.
of course I don't love him anymore, I did but I could never let myself hurt like that.
i get up quickly, needing a distraction. when I hear my buzzer go off.
my heart speeds up and I doubt my entire plan. this was stupid you need to back out, just don't answer he'll go away.
the buzzer goes off again and I curse at myself.
Why did I do this? Fuck it.
i run awkwardly to the door, looking through the peep hole I see him standing by the door talking to himself although I can't hear his words.
He holds flowers in one hand, I smile to myself he looks just as nervous as I am.
I open the door abruptly and he stops his mumbling. "may-" He says quickly.
i give a warm smile. our eyes meet and I stand aimlessly at the door.
"Oh-I'm sorry, come in." I say moving aside so he can walk in. "Cold outside?" I ask. I turn around and see him standing quietly. "oh, yeah it's a bit cold." He says.
he extends his hand giving me the flowers. i walk towards him, taking them from him. "Fuck-" My finger starts bleeding when my finger swipes one of the nasty thorns on the roses. "Oh-oh shit I'm so sorry-" I look up meeting his distressed eyes, the pain is there but barely noticeable.
i hold my finger tightly. "You need a Band-Aid or something where do- shit I really didn't mean for this to happen-"
"it's okay it's a small cut I'll be fine." I say confused why he's so upset.
I walk over to my kitchen finding a Band-Aid easily. "are you okay?" i ask him. "you're asking me if I'm okay?" He asks. "Yeah?"
He smiles. "What?" I ask. "I'm not really okay." He said.
my eyes relax. "why?" I ask. "I don't know I've been okay my whole life, but ever since I saw you again, I haven't been okay." He said.