Broken soul

Happy Or Sad?

I hear The sound of the rain hitting the metal Slide right across my window, that's when I realise i have to take all the clothes hanging outside before it gets wet.... I took all the clothes in my hand as i was hanging it within my house i looked at my reflection in the mirror...... Tear stained cheeks, dried lips, messy bun.. I look the same like yesterday the same eyes which lacks affection..... It is nothing new to me cause this is how i always look.... I sat in the chair and looked at my reflection again maybe i could find something that can  prove the society that i can survive without being physically beautiful  ...... No, i didn't find anything... Maybe this is how i should live from now on

    Being born in a society where beauty is the only best thing is the biggest mistake of my lifetime. I was born as the most beautiful girl child.... Everyone who take a look at me would say they have never met a baby this beautiful..... Wish i would have stayed like that forever. .... When i turned 10, my family came to know i inherited a terrible disease from my great grandparents.... They don't want me to grow up with such a ill medical condition ... In fact we are pretty wealthy people, my parents started consulting various doctors to find a cure.... But everything ends up in vain.. In the mean time, i started to loose weight.... Not only that my skin tone changed from pale to honey colour which is why i couldn't get accepted in my society ....This society believes only white colour people are the prettiest one..... My parents got extremely worried about me atlast they found a medicine which can have pretty bad side effects but it would completely cure my disease..... At first when i get to know about the side affects i backed off.... I am someone who loves my self even i was thin and dark in skin tone but i was afraid the side effects might cause serious problems for me.... My parents being the worried ones forcefully made me get my medicine... Once i had the medicine, it felt better to know that i got cured from a serious disease.... But things took a serious turn in life when puberty hits me.... I become a person i could no longer recognise...... I started to hate my self for how i look...  My face completely turned into a mess i got acnes which turned my face to a completely different person...... I started to gain too much weight without me eating anything other than healthy food