detriment

tooth fairy

slamming bathroom doors with my tooth tied around a string. fairies would slide a five dollar bill as i fell asleep blurry with tears and false pride. what a cheap way for kids to be taught that pain is rewarded.
or, when my city boy would bite into my shoulder. bruises on my arms, and he would smile, "now you look like mine."

sometimes an ache is good. but not always.
i'm tired of the romanticization of hurting and being hurt.
i want you to see my changes. but you're gone. i want you to see how i've ultimately stayed the same. but you're gone.
december in depth of looking within myself without you.
who am i; if you are not pulling my hair like grade school. teased by regret and pain and unearthly words.

guess i'm just a girl who doesn't know her worth