A Memory

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Y/n's POV

I wake up in a meadow... Not quite sure how I got here. But something feels off, but I can't seem to put my finger on it. I stare at the clouds, getting distracted by their dynamic shapes. I see one of a mouse with big ears. As I stare at it being drifted by the wind, I see the form shape ever so slowly. I stare at the mouse-shaped cloud, taking in deep breaths of fresh air that filled my lungs with pure bliss. The cloud starts to form smaller ears that flopped a bit and the mouse's tail shrinks in length but grows in width. I stare at the small changes, trying to keep track of them as they come and go.

Not long after I let out a deep sigh, I see a fluffy creature hover over me. I shake my head slightly to make out what is in front of me... It's my dog, Winnie! I feel a smile form on my face as the dog starts licking my face. 

"Hello, Winnie! How's my good girl?" I laugh as I start petting Winnie's head as she continues to happily give me kisses. 

I hear Winnie make a playful sound as I start sitting up. Her tail wagging swiftly, she runs and grabs a stick to bring to me. Not to throw, but just to show me what she found! She happily trots back and curls up on my lap, not caring that she's no longer a lap dog. I coo at Winnie and start petting her more on the head to the back. Feeling her soft fur makes me feel so calm. She rolls onto her back while still being on my lap, and began waving her paws around. One paw lands on my cheek, which automatically makes my smile wider. I grab and catch the paw that smells like popcorn. I never knew why but sometimes her paws would smell like popcorn. It brought a strange sense of comfort. I rub her belly and give her kisses on her fluffy chin, wishing this moment could last forever.  Serotonin is running through my body like adrenaline. 

I begin to not feel her paw in my hand anymore. I look and see it's not there. My eyebrows furrow as I look more. I see that Winnie is starting to disintegrate into dust. No... ash. No... Please no, Winnie. I just got you back... please don't go. I grab onto whatever of her was left but my hands would just turn her into more ash. Panicking, I try and grab hold of her body but it just goes through my hands like dry sand... Her tail is still wagging as it starts to be blown away by the gentle breeze. I make eye contact with her, and she's still smiling. She sees I'm distressed and lets out a small whimper, trying to put her other paw on my face, but it just turns into ash.

"Winnie no! Please stay! I'm begging you" I begin to sob as I see her rest her head on my lap, getting tired. I try to lightly touch her ear but it just starts to fall apart. 

"WINNIE!"

I wake up, sitting straight up in a panic. I feel around my bed and don't feel anything. I'm on my bed alone. I look around my room frantically and see an urn with a pink paw print on it. I feel like my throat is being stabbed with multiple tiny needles as the realization starts to hit me again. 

She's dead...

She's been dead for over a month now... That urn on my shelf is holding her ashes. I begin to break down and wail, burying my face in my hands. I curl into a ball and bury myself under my bedsheets in sorrow. Winnie was one of the best things to ever have in my life. She always knew when I was upset or stressed. Her tail would wag so aggressively that her little butt would shake. It was the cutest thing. When she'd want attention, she'd simply just put her paw on my leg. And if I ignored her, she places her paw on my shoulder, giving me a few nose rubs. 

A bunch of memories, good and bad start flooding into my head. Each memory played out like a little movie. It was just like I was back there with her. It was unbearable. I didn't want to think about her because doing so would make things worse. As each memory comes and goes, I cry harder and harder. 

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