Me And My Anxiety

09/11/21

November is one of the hardest months with Anxiety, there are more people out and about with Christmas coming up. I plan what I have to get and where I have to get it when November hits you can't always get what you need in the same shop as you always do so that makes my plan all messed up and it gets worst in December but it's a good thing I have most of my Xmas shopping done got them when I had extra money and they are getting amazing gifts, I know everyone I got the gifts for they will love them I put a lot of thought into them because I love to make people happy, make them smile, that's the best gift I can get. I just need there more gift, a box of biscuits for my cousin and her hubby, my other cousin's kids Kian and Caleb, they get money I've seen Kain two times and I haven't met Caleb yet maybe I will but I don't live with my parents so I might not and I don't go out much and I really know their mum but I ken their dad so yea. Anyways at least that is one thing I don't have to worry about I have kat, Nikki's, Hayden, mum, dad, pauls, Mhari's and my nana's so doing well. I have to get the wrapping paper this month and get them wrapped up so I don't have to worry about that. This is why I started early or I would start panicking and stressing out that I won't have the money for them but I'm calmer cause I know I have most of them. ok so the doctor changed my Anxiety meds but they have been causing me pain in my stomach, not sleeping until like 4 am or after 4 am, forgetting to turn the cooker off and I've had no energy to do anything so I have to stop them starting today and I have to stay off them for 4 days but cause it will be the weekend they want me to stay off them for 6 days so I need to start them on Monday and hopefully they will help me, WISH ME LUCK!. I know of meds that do help but they don't seem to want to give me them for some weird reason. Of course, when Xmas comes along all the lights come out and Rexie loved the lights, We would walk around and look at all the lights and pick out new ones for her cause she broke the other ones.  I miss her so much, she loved the Christmas lights, singing and dancing toys, chocolate, her hot chocolate with brandy in it. Christmas is hard for my family but we do it for Hayden as well, he gets spoiled just like his Auntie Rexie did. I would help Rexie open her gifts but I didn't get to on her last Christmas Kat did it with her, once she opened everyone's the day before Christmas when we were young so mum and dad had to wrap them all again it was so funny lol. She loved seeing how things worked but didn't know how to put them back together again. In the picture, the green thing around her neck was dancing, singing tree and having chocolate all over her face which she did a lot, she really was one of a kind and made me so happy.