Naruto Senju: Prophecy Child

Monsterous Tsunade

When the two Anbu looked at what had become of their comrade, they quietly gulped behind their masks, looked at one another, and deeply pondered their choices. The first option was to try defend their Hokage with their lives like any true Anbu member, but of course they would most likely be killed or suffer a worse fate than the one their twisted comrade had endured. The second choice was that they could move aside and let Tsunade through where she would proceed to dismember and most likely kill their Hokage...but they would live.

The choice was clear.

The two Anbu silently nodded in agreement and as if they could read each other's mind they turned to Minato who was looking at the in silent curiosity before they spoke in strange unison.

"Forgive us, Hokage-sama, but we enjoy living too much and having our body parts the way they are now," spoke the two Anbu together at which point they both used a Shunshin to get the pretzel-shaped Anbu and then used it again to make their escape.

None of their comrades would blame them.

"Cowards, the both of them! What happened to protecting and serving the Hokage with your lives?!" Minato thought angrily; although at the way that Tsunade was looking at him he was starting to think that the two shinobi might've had the right idea since he was wishing that he was anywhere but his office at the moment.

As Tsunade walked towards Minato with the intent to reach over his desk and begin wringing his neck, Jiraiya bravely or foolishly—depending on who was asked—placed himself between Minato and the wrathful Senju.

"Hey now, hime, calm down and tell us what's going on? I don't know what you think Minato did to you, but I really think he's gotta be innocent. He's been here the whole time and he would never do anything that would get you this mad at him. I know him better than that," said the Toad Sage, really hoping he would be able to calm his angry teammate down. Although as he tried, he recalled only one other time ever seeing Tsunade this mad: the one time he ever peeked in on her when she was in the Konoha Hot Springs.

"Here the whole time?! Here the whole time except for that night at Tanzaku Gai where he got me drunk and we spent the night at that shitty hotel where he knocked me up!" shouted the surprisingly angrier medic.

"Huh...?" Jiraiya muttered as all sound seized around them. He honestly couldn't quite believe what he just heard and was soon joined by Hiruzen and Minato who were equally gob smacked.

"Are you all deaf or are you too thickheaded to understand?! Well, here it is, plain and simple so that even you dumbasses can understand!

The other three were still frozen.

"That bastard student of yours got me pregnant!" she roared at her teammate.

This of course got an immediate reaction from the famous shinobi.

Hiruzen's eyes grew to the size of saucers on his wrinkled face as his jaw hit the floor.

Jiraiya was doing a perfect imitation of a gaping fish since his brain had shut down, simply not being able to compute what his ears just absorbed.

Minato...he just fainted.

Shizune couldn't blame them since she was in the same boat when she found out. To say that the medical apprentice was shocked when her sensei told her that she had slept with the Yondaime Hokage and was now carrying his child, something that many women all over Konoha would have loved to have done, would be like saying that Jiraiya was only a little perverted.

"Tsu-Tsunade-sama, please calm down! All this stress can't be good for the baby," Shizune pleaded gently at the end.

Surprisingly, this comment seemed to have gotten through to Tsunade. She paused to gather her thoughts and started to calm down a bit after taking a deep breath.