Nyctophilia

30

She left her shoes by the foyer and walked further into what she'd hesitate to call home, searching the silent space for her mother but finding only emptiness. 

Trying not to think excessively of it, Nyx made her way to her room only to find the door left ajar. Upon pushing it open fully, she saw a sight she'd lost hope of seeing.

Nova had been engulfed in her daughter's safe place, the room she had been avoiding for so many months now. 

She'd been in these walls, skimming and reminiscing, for hours now, ever since her daughter had confessed that she'd found a more promising person to count on to stay. 

It guilted the woman, she knew she hadn't been the best support to her child. 

When Nyx had finally made her realize how wrong she was being without holding even the smallest of grudges, it had hit Nova that her daughter was now grown up. Her little girl had been forced to come to terms with her parent's absence.

"Mom," Nyx's voice was a whisper, lips parted, still unable to entirely comprehend the situation. "Hey, what are you. . .what are you doing here?"

Nova gave a small smile. 

It scared Nyx. She hadn't seen her mother's beautiful smile in so long.

"Midnight has always been your favorite," Nova began, tucking a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear while she ran her hands over the midnight hues of the walls. 

She then looked up at the constellations on the ceiling, "I'll never forget the first time you had smiled. A star had fallen from the sky that night, it came shooting past this window the moment you'd looked up at the sky. It will always be my favorite memory,"

Nyx had heard this story before. It made her smile too. 

Her mother had taught her all about the night, she was the reason why the nyctophile was so in love with her element.

Then, almost like reality kicked her, Nova's gaze cast down to her empty hands. "Your father called earlier today," she said.

Nyx didn't know what to say, from the way the woman looked at terms with a loss she knew was impending, the girl knew it wasn't good news. 

This is what she was prepared for though - not coming to terms with losing her parent, no, that was always going to be tough, but she was now ready to accept that not everything could be held on to forever.

"What did he say?" she asked, moving over to sit down on her bed. 

Nova's smile flattened but stayed as she, too, took a seat next to her daughter. The pair had lost memory of when they'd been this close last.

"He's not coming home," Nova admitted, repeating her husband's words. 

Nyx gave a slow nod, "We've known that for quite some time now."

Nova nodded too, still not looking her child in the eye. "We've. . .we've decided to finally let this go. Legal separation on mutual agreement. It's-it's for the best," 

Somewhere in their hearts, though they felt sad, there was relief surging. 

There would be no hopeless games anymore. 

The Hayden family, though far apart, could now live their lives without fearing their return home - a place they'd all grown out of.

"I understand, mom. I really do." Nyx gave a small smile. "We can't keep dragging this anymore, you've both got new places to be. To go someplace else we have to move out of where we're presently stuck,"

"Why are you making this easy?" Nova's emerald eyes glistened as she asked softly.

Nyx bit her bottom lip and looked up at her constellations. "Because I don't have the strength or will to make it any harder than it already is. As you said, it's for the best. We're not giving up, we're only moving on from rusted ties that have only kept us apart for so long. I think. . .I think we deserve a new chance, we're all tired of running from each other in circles,"

Her mother's lips quivered, she couldn't take it anymore. Hearing her daughter talk like this, it made her wonder just how much time she'd missed seeing her grow into a better person. 

"I'm sorry," Nova broke down, a hot tear landing on her trembling hand. "I'm so sorry for everything. . .for-for turning my back on you w-when all I needed was you. . . when all we needed was each other,"

Nyx didn't hesitate to hold her mother's hand in a comforting embrace. "We all make mistakes, mom. It's been hard, I've missed you, but I know where you're coming from. It's okay,"

"No, nothing can excuse the way I've treated you," Nova shook her head, warm tears still cascading down from her florid face. "I just. . .it's just that you-you have his eyes,"

The nyctophile's heart stopped for a beat. 

She knew this, she was well aware of how she'd inherited her father's blazing eyes, his cinnamon hair, his smile. She knew that she was no less than the man's reflection, a face that reminded her mother of all that she had lost.

"Looking at you, it-it. . .it reminded me of him. And so I stopped. I wasn't strong, Nyx, I couldn't face such a big part of my world knowing that I didn't have it anymore. I was weak, all I had was the power to selfishly not look at my child for something that wasn't even your fault. I've been horrible to you when you deserved none of it," Nova confessed, admitting to her mistake, feeling so much lighter now that the heaviest weight was slowly dropping from her chest.

"I know, mom." Nyx gave a half-hearted smile. "It's been just as hard for me, I get it. I'd look at you and see the parent I hadn't lost - a big part of my world that I still had, you know?"

Nova tightened her hold on her daughter's hand and swore, "You still have me, you'll always have me. I promise you, Nyx, there's nothing strong enough to take me away from you, not anymore. You can count on me just like I can count on you."

Nyx had waited so long to hear her mother say this, it almost sounded unreal. 

It came as a relieving surprise to her when Nova smiled and embraced her into her arms after many, many moons, holding her little girl close. 

Nyx's grip tightened around her mother, wanting to assure herself that she hadn't wandered off into her imagination, that this was really happening.

"I'm sorry for costing us so much time," Nova apologized, rubbing her daughter's back delicately. 

Nyx couldn't contain her smile as she added, "It all happens for a reason, mom. However long and hard it was, it brought us back to how we used to be, how we are now."

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Over three hours later, now past midnight, Nova and Nyx sat on a picnic blanket in their backyard. 

They lay under the same sky, letting the stars smile down at them, engulfed in the warmth of their sweaters, empty takeout boxes discarded on the side. 

The nyctophile had filled her mother in on everything she'd missed, starting from the trio at the diner that now meant family to her, moving on to the golden boy and the halcyon, even briefly mentioning the veiled vision, ending by telling her all about the raven monster she had fallen for.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•