Find That Hacker || Play for the Win || (2021)

Chapter 43

"You ever get scared that might be what drives you apart at the end?" She asked staring at the floor.

I tightened my grip on the doorknob. "Yes."

She finally turned around and leaned over the tub. "Then what do you do?"

What do I do? I thought back on yesterday. I relaxed and smiled at her. "I trust."

"Trust?"

Mmmm. How do I explain this? "I have no control of the outcome, so I can only trust. Trust myself to act based on my intuition. To do my best to show love and appreciation. Trust him to show me the same effort. Trust in the moments we spend together to hold some value in our life. Trust that if it's right it will work out, if not then at least I gave my all."

She stayed silent for a moment and then she sunk into the water.

I closed the door smiling. Yep, she'll be alright.

***

Later that night I kept tossing and turning in bed. My head was just filled with thoughts from the whole day. 

I tiptoed downstairs and went straight to the living room. It was around three am so I picked up the home phone and I dialed Elric's number. Luckily I knew him to be a night bird.

He answered pretty fast. "Can't sleep?"

"Mmm." I whined and curled on the couch, holding the phone to my ear.

"Wanna talk about something?" He asked.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Just sitting on my couch working."

I let out a long sigh.

"Talk to me." He said and I could hear him putting the laptop away.

I wanted to hear his voice. Then I wanted to tell him about the Sole conversation about Ace. But where do a girl even start?

Then Sole's question rang in my ears.

"Do you...." I started and then paused. "I know you love me, but sometimes I wonder. Don't you think you'd be a better fit with someone more similar to you? Someone who understands what you're doing?"

"Francy..." His voice carried a confident note. "I don't need another me in my life. I just need you to keep making me laugh, and let me hold you at the end of a really long day. That's all. You're so good to me I'm always questioning if I'm doing enough. I can be so harsh with my words sometimes, and I keep thinking about work and.."

"You're doing enough." I interrupted him. "I really like that side of you. You're rational and logical, you've been through things and know the world isn't a fair place, but you make it easy for me to be me. You try to understand me and indulge me in the things I like. So I'm always trying to indulge you in the things you like...." I stopped there.

"Then why are you hesitant?" He asked.

"But am I doing things you like?"

"Of course you do. You always let me chose what to order for date night."

"That's because you always choose something yummy," I argued.

"You never tell me how to drive."

"It's cause I don't know how to."

"You always bring me my favorite coffee when I'm working."

"That I do." I smiled and then sighed. "But I can't talk to you about your work. I don't understand anything."

He chuckled. "Well.. Let's see... I can tell you why I like creating games. I think you can understand that much.."

The way he chuckled made the heavyweight in my chest dissipate..

" Games are important to people. You can get lost in them as much as books, you get a sense of accomplishment when you win something and you can vent anger out when you're stressed. You get excited to explore a different world, you get competitive trying to beat others and you tune out from the noisy world."

"Do you think we hate the world and that's why we people, like reading books, watching movies and playing games? Because we can forget about it for a while."

"Huh.." He paused. "No.. I don't think anyone hates the world. They just hate the circumstances they're in at the moment. The world has everything in equal measure if you ask me. For every suffering there is happiness. For every loss, there is gain. For every effort, there is a prize."

I rolled on my back and stared at the ceiling. "Life is not fair in many ways though. There are many people who are frustrated and sad and lonely."

"True. Some cope and try to find happiness in little things while waiting for a break others wallow in self-pity and hurt others. How the balance shifts after that is up to them. I think those who live for the purpose of being happy, gain many things in life. If you're constantly in search of something material to make you happy it will always be out of reach."

"But what about goals and ambitions? They strive for getting a nice car or a nice pair of shoes." I said.

"They are great. If you're working wholeheartedly towards it is part of happiness. Ace and I want to be really successful and dominate the industry. But even right now as I'm working at three am in the morning, I'm happy doing the work to get there."

There was a silence on the line.

"You're still there?" He asked.

"Please never change," I told him.

He laughed. I could imagine him smiling proudly. "I won't. Don't you either. Okay, trouble?"

I smiled. "Of course."

"So who got you in this philosophical mood?" He asked.

"Sole. She has the love fever."

"Ace will be glad to hear that. I spent the whole afternoon giving him study material just to get him to stop looking at her painting."

"She keeps denying the feelings. She doesn't let Remi and I talk to her about it." I said.

"Well have in mind she doesn't want to be lonely. Having feelings for someone who is out of sight is hard, and when you guys leave it will be even harder for her."

Oh no. I just realized it. When we leave, Sole is going to be all alone.

"What do you think I should do?"

"Nothing for now. The best thing you can do for her is just having fun while you're there."

I nodded. I need to make a checklist for tomorrow.

I sent him a kiss through the phone. "Thank you for the talk babe. I love you so so much. You always make me feel better."

"Anytime." He answered proudly.

"You too. Call me anytime you want to talk. I'll hang up now also I can get some sleep. Talk to you tomorrow."

"Love you, good night."

"Night." I sent him another kiss.