As Good as Gold (Dreamnoblade)

As Good as Gold

It was summer which meant Technoblade was resting, something he did not do very often. All he wanted to do was sit at home reading whichever greek myth had piqued his interest for the rest of the sunny season. And for some time he did just that. He would take care of his wolves, tend to his potatoes, and curl up in his favorite lounge chair, reading. Sadly all good things have to end.

The biggest thing to ruin his peace was when his entire family decided to visit.

"It's me bitch!" Tommy shouts opening Techno's front door with so much force it hits the wall with a thud.

Techno looks up from the potions he was brewing in confusion.

"I thought you were at summer camp?"

"That camp couldn't keep the big man Tommyinnit!" Techno's ears press against his head at the sudden loud noise.

"What you mean is you got kicked out cause you're a gremlin," Wilbur states sauntering in.

"Fuck off dick-head!" Tommy shrieks.

"You burnt down a cabin." Wilbur deadpans.

"It's not my fault the walls couldn't take a little bit of fire!"

"It was made of wood! What did you think would happen?!"

"Boys," Phil walks into the house shooting Techno an apologetic look before turning back to the two bickering. "Did you even say hello to Techno?".

Techno pales at the use of his name. He had learned from spending a childhood with these idiots that getting involved in their arguments was never a good idea, lest you be sucked into madness with them.

He shifts from one foot to the other as both boys turn their attention to him.

"Ah yes my only bearable brother!" Wilbur exclaims walking over to him and enveloping him in a hug.

"You mean my only bearable brother!" Tommy shouts, grabbing Techno's hand from where it had been hanging awkwardly at his side. (He never knows what to do when he is hugged so he just stands there, rigid, until the person lets go.).

Yanking him away from Wilburs grasp Tommy pulls him over to where Phil was watching with what could only be described as tired defeat on his face.

"Techno you have to save me from that bitch." Tommy says in a serious voice. Wilbur makes an offended noise from where he is standing by the door.

"Uh ok?" Techno is so very confused. "But why are you all here?" He asks, concerned. His family doesn't come to his house at the same time unless they all planned something, and from what Techno remembers they didn't plan anything (because Tommy was supposed to be at summer camp, but we all know how that turned out-)

"About that," Phil chuckles nervously rubbing the back of his neck. That makes Techno very concerned.

"Phil?" Techno questions suspiciously.

"WE'RE STAYING HERE WITH YOU BITCH!" Tommy shouts before Phil can answer.

Techno's eyes snap to Phil's in an instant because what? What?

"Phil..." Techno says apprehensively praying his brother was lying.

"Heh." Phil looks at him timidly.

"You're kidding."

And that's how Techno got stuck with his family for the rest of his peaceful summer.