SS | Judas Kiss [Ishqbaaaz AU]

One

Six months. That's how much time Anika had given Shivaay to prove himself as someone human. As someone born with compassion and the ability to love. Six Months.

And just like she gave those six months to him, in mere seconds without realizing that this was a second chance she was handing out, the six months were going to be over soon, with nothing sorted out and things appearing more tangled than before.

Shivaay stared at his reflection in the mirror. His face appeared weary and tired. His eyes had large grey circles underneath them, and his pale skin did little to hide the wreck churning inside his body. He heaved a sigh, that tightened up his muscles more than allowing them to relax; and picked up the bottle of gel to smother his hair with. 

In few seconds, his appearance of appearing as the 'Great Wall of Shivaay' was complete. Not a hair out of place.

There was an obvious torment of emotions swirling inside him as he left his room and made his way from the halls towards the family breakfast area. Sometimes he thought, the mansion was too big for the family's own good. He felt her presence halfway through the stairway. His steps toppled but regaining his composure, he made his way downstairs.

The only part of her that was visible was the edge of her dupatta trailing behind her while she stood silently in the corner of the kitchen, listening to Rudra and Someya fight unnecessarily over how gujrati-desi ghee differed from the one in the house. 

His presence into her near surroundings was usually received coldly so her obliviousness to him today appeared as a symbol of hope.

"Anika." he broke into her thoughts, handing the trailing dupatta behind her.

She took the piece of cloth and gathered the flowing piece of cloth to throw around her neck instead of on her shoulder.

"Anika, tum theek ho?" he questioned seeing her refrain from being a chatterbox that she usually was. 

trans. [Anika, are you alright?]

His words were loud and clear, perhaps that is why Rudra and Someya quietened down abruptly, only to rudely stare at the two.

Shivaay turned around to give them an ogling stare that pushed Someya into pulling Rudra out of the kitchen.

"Anika?" he asked again, seeing her walk past him and pour an egg into the pan for breakfast.

"kya?" she replied, with exaggerated agitation on her face visible.

trans. [What?]

"tum bohat khamosh ho?" he questioned, trying to smoothen out the tension.

trans. [You're pretty quiet?]

"Kyun? Khomashi pe tax hai? Mera mun hai. Meri marzi, jab istemal karoon aur jab dil chae nahi istemaal karo." her tone was icy.

trans. [Why? Is silence also being taxed? It's my mouth, my voice. I am going to use it whenever I deem it fit to use and whenever I don't want to use it.]

Shivaay nodded with approval at her statement and moved away to toast the bread. His hands were getting clammy and he could feel the tension rise in his neck again. 

The disguised act of civility from her had lasted through six months despite the crossroads' moments between them in past months. He wanted to know her decision. 

Tomorrow would only mark the anniversary of the day he had committed one of the most heinous acts of his lifetime. Forcing her, and blackmailing her into a marriage with him. Violating all forms of consent.

He turned around to open his mouth, to let her know that he had proved himself to be a human being enough to know her decision except maybe he was too late because she left the space that allowed her to be with him, with the silence that countered how much she had caused a ruckus when she entered his life.

He put the dry toast on his plate as they popped out of the toaster and seated himself next to Rudra and Someya. His life was supposed to be colorful and happy. His life was supposed to be perfect. Not this.