Learn to Love » Draco Malfoy x Reader

XIV

"I appreciate that," I gave a small smile. "I'm aware the ring wasn't your choice."

"And none of this was your choice."

"I suppose not. It's just the cards we've been dealt, being in these families."

"Yeah... that's it..." his voice trailed.

I gave him a skeptical look with a raised eyebrow, silently asking what he meant by that. He simply shook his head, as if moving onto the next topic.

"Do you ever think about that? How you've been thrown in this, just expected to live out your life as if you weren't in this... situation," he asked.

Of course I have. It's all I do, seemingly. I feel like it consumes me wholly, but I couldn't necessarily say that. As much as I didn't want to marry him, I still had respect for him as my husband. I didn't want it to sound like I absolutely hated him. There were, in theory, worse people to be thrown to.

"I try to avoid thinking about it as much as possible. However, I still do, a lot of the time."

He stayed silent for a moment. He gestured to bench on the path and sat down. I took my place next to him.

"I figured you wouldn't want to walk around in those heels. Sorry, it just occurred to me now," he bashfully apologized. He brushed a few loose strands of hair out of his face.

"It didn't bother me," I assured him, trying to get comfortable on the seat. "But thank you."

We both looked up at the stars. I knew he was quite apt regarding astronomy —we were in the same class and he always appeared to get the highest marks— so I'm sure he had plenty to say. At least, I thought so, but his eyes weren't focused. They seemed like they were absentmindedly looking up to pass time.

"I think about it all the time," he softly muttered.

"You do?" I turned my neck to look at him, who did the same to meet my gaze.

"Every waking minute."

Then, it was my turn to stay silent. I didn't quite know what a proper response to that would be. I couldn't exactly say that was pathetic, because I was almost doing the same. I couldn't say it wasn't worth it, since it wasn't an easy situation to adapt to.

"I'm sorry it affects you so negatively," I opted to reply as coolly as possible.

"I didn't say that."

"Isn't that what you meant?"

"Not quite," his voice hushed to just above a whisper before pausing for a moment. His breath hitched before he spoke again. "You're not a bad choice for wife, y/n."

"Oh," I sighed, slightly embarrassed. I felt the same about him, that there were worse options. It almost shocked me that I was thinking that, though. Just a few weeks, perhaps just days ago, I would've thought differently. "You're not the worst choice for a husband, either."

A small grin tugged on his lips. He returned his attention to the sky.

"You know, we never even got a honeymoon," he lightly laughed, causing me to do the same.

"At the time, I don't think it would've been put to good use. We couldn't stand being in the same room, let alone on a vacation somewhere together."

"I know what you mean," he chuckled, which I returned. "I remember how quickly you pulled away from our first kiss."

"Our only kiss, too. I don't think either of us were thrilled for our wedding kiss, not with all of our families watching, expecting it of us."