on 106.1 and I let everything out. I screamed

and cried punching the steering wheel

"What the fuck?!" I screamed as loud as I

could, I realize now that I'm glad that I had

the radio turned up that high because if

someone walking by would've heard me I

would've been extremely embarrassed if

they knocked on the window and asked if I

was okay. Although it would've been better

than what happened later those next couple

of days. I had finally calmed down enough

to turn the radio down, I reached over and

grabbed my water bottle, my throat was

raw and I was super thirsty. I reached into

the center console and pulled out a can of

chew (Copenhagen) I drained the rest of the

water in a couple of gulps, and put some in

my lip. I hadn't chewed in a week, I was

trying to quit, it had already started to dry

out, but I didn't care, the taste was as good

as I had remembered. It calmed me down

pretty quick, I remembered my dad always

chewing, he had to stop once he got

admitted to the hospital. I thought back to

my first time trying it, "Hey dad, can I have

some?" We were outside working on the

fence in the pasture.  He chuckled, "sure

son, but you're not gonna like it." He handed

me the can, I already knew what to do from

seeing my dad do it so many times the years

before. "Don't swallow any of it or you'll get

sick," "Okay," I stood there with it in my lip

and spat on the ground. "So? What's the

verdict?" "It tastes bad," he chuckled, "but

other than that, I don't think I'm gonna be

sick." "Well good, let's get back to it."

"Alright." Another tear fell down my cheek, I

smiled and wiped it away and drove to my

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⏰ Last updated: Jan 28, 2023 ⏰

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