Tw
For the first time in my life I finally felt free. I thought I would regret everything. Yet, I didn't. I felt the happiest I have ever been in my life. I knew I would be set free. Soon enough, all my pain and suffering would just be wiped away. It would be gone, and just like that.
I was always scared of death. I was always scared of how my death might affect my family and friends. I thought that, until I learned nobody really cared. I was like a childhood toy. I was always there, laying around ready to be played with, but nobody wanted to play with me.
I was always told things would get better, "It's a bad day, not a bad life." Is what everyone would always say. I believed it at first, until it turned to bad weeks, then bad months, then bad years. There was no more happiness left for me in the world. I was empty. It came to the point where I no longer believed it would just be a bad day. I couldn't live. Constant restless nights, starving myself because I wasn't like the other girls, cutting my wrists and just watching the blood drip down my pale skinny arm. My ribs were piercing through my chest, but I didn't care. It satisfied me, it made me happy in the moment. I liked the pain I'd put myself through when I did it. I don't know why, it just felt good. I don't know if it was because it would take my anger out, or because my life just came to that point where I didn't care anymore. Either way, it was nice.
"I'm fine..." I would always say with a smile on my face. I said I was fine even though I wasn't. I would say that with a fear everyone would hate me more if I told them the truth.
My adrenaline was pumping, blood rushing through my body, The wind stabbing my back as I fell. Closer, and closer, and closer to the end of my 'legacy.'
I definitely didn't live the best life, but it was a life.
As I felt my body go numb, I knew. Any second now my pain would be gone for good. The wailing of sirens in the distance, the screaming and mourning of the familiar voices around me. This is what I wanted... right?
The end
