My Daddy Crush . Robert Downey Jr (Slow Updates)

~𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 1~

Danielle

I'm about to have my first kiss and I feel absolutely nothing. No excitement, no flutters, not even a glimmer of curiosity.

It's me. I'm sure of it, after more than a dozen dates. My fault, my problem. Me

I twist out of my date's clammy hold and step away, putting my back to my front door. "Um, Jed, I think maybe- "

There's no time to avoid his swoop. My mouth's still open when we collide in a messy mix of teeth (mine) and tongue (his). I don't even think before shoving him off.

"What the hell?!" I swipe a sleeve over the mess he's made of my face.

"You didn't like that?"

"I don't think I'm ready for- "

"What? Come on. Just a kiss."

"Seriously, I'm not- "

"Hey, I walked you home. At least invite me in." He pauses for a second before going on. "Come on, babe. Let me in. We'll see where this- "

"She said no." The low, and rough voice comes out of nowhere and I can tell it frightens my date. Relief floods me to the tips of my extremities.

"Excuse me?" Jed turns to peer into dark.

Quick, decisive footsteps scuff down a set of wooden stairs, over a few feet of sidewalk, then up onto my porch. It's Robert, my neighbour. Like every other time I've seen him, something flops around in my belly, heavy and hot. So maybe it's not all me - Maybe I've been dating the wrong guys.

Maybe I should date Robert.

"Take off." Robert's tone leaves no room for argument.

"What?"

"She doesn't want to invite you in. She doesn't want you to touch her. Get out of here."

My date's chest puffs out before he fully takes my neighbour in. I can tell the second he realizes just how outclassed he is because he deflates, like a balloon. "Whatever, man."

I know it's not right, but something dark inside me wishes he wouldn't back down. I picture Robert's thick, veined - darkened hands grabbing Jed's lapels, imagine the way his back muscles would ripple if he threw him out into the street.

Here I go again, thinking ridiculous Robert thoughts at the worst possible moment. It happens every time he shows up. My insides get tense and achy and I want things I'd never thought to wish for. Right now, I'm out of breath, sick to my stomach, and so hot I want to shed my coat.

"Later, babe." Jed's clearly not looking for a fight. And that's fine. It's good. A fight would be an awful end to the evening. He flicks me a look, lifting his chin in a way that is supposed to me macho, but looks childish.

"Well, no," I reply. "Not later. I don't think..."

He's already gone, crunching down the leaf - strewn street toward the university.

"It's an expression," Robert tells me with a smirk. A second later, his lips tighten into a frown and one dark eyebrow lifts. "Unless you want to see him again? You want me to call him back? Did I butt in when I shouldn't have?"

I shake my head, remembering the feel of Jed's slobber on my face and the fear that he wouldn't back down. I should go inside and wash him off, but I can't go anywhere while Robert's standing here. "Definitely not. Thank you, Robert."

"Another bad one, huh?"

"Wasn't great." My breath puffs out between us. It's cold, I notice, though I'm clammy - hot from my proximity to this man.

"You let this one walk you home?"

"I thought..." What did I think, exactly? That it wasn't top bad? That he wasn't a total jerk? I can't tell Robert what's running through my head because even I, in all my innocence, know that this line of thinking is pathetic: He didn't gross me out, so I let him walk me home. "I don't know. I was hopeful, I guess."

"Prick doesn't know how to kiss a woman goodnight." Robert shifts like he's about to leave and I can't let that happen. Everything I've been looking for in a man is right here. He's twice my age, fine, but that shouldn't matter.

He's single - I think - and the way he makes me feel is like nothing I've experienced.

"Night, Danielle." He turns to go, whistling low for Squid, who slides silently from the shadows of my porch. I've never seen a dog quite so quiet as this one. So stealthy, I hadn't seen him arrive.

"Wait."

Robert stops and looks at me, far enough out of my porch light's glow that his eyes are two bright, dark brown holes in his broad, high cheekboned face. There's the slight stubble growing on his face, and I tighten my hands into fists to keep myself from touching him there.

"You, um... You do this with all the neighbours?"

"This?" He glances out at the dimly - lit street with its trees and wonky sidewalks and the long line of row houses.

"Late - night front porch interventions."

He exhales. "You're the only one, Danielle."

My "Oh" is more breath than voice.

Balanced on the edge of the top porch step, Robert stands like he's aching to leave, fingers agitated, body vibrating with pent up energy. What would it be like to see him let it all out, instead of holding it in? Colossal, I imagine. Explosive.

"How should he have done it?" I address his antsy silhouette, courageous now that his face is entirely in shadow.

He goes very still, head tilted at a curious angle. "Done it?"

"Kissed me goodnight."

"Not like that."

"But how?" Even in the dark, I can't keep my eyes from Robert's lips.

A car approaches, its lights skimming his back before it slows for the stop sign. It's like that outside presence pushes a button, releases him from his frozen position. He shifts down to the first step, putting a few more inches between us. "You, uh..." I can hear him swallow, the sound loud in the night. Everything's strangely still, reminding me of a film set. My porch right on the sidewalk, but so enclosed we might as well be inside. "Not something I can explain, you know? There's just a right and a wrong way and that was definitely the wro- "

"Show me." The words come bursting out, though I guess the idea's been there for a while. Maybe since the first time I saw Robert.

"Come again?"

"Show me how you kiss a woman goodnight."