Finding Andrew

Chapter 12

5 years later

          “This is too hard!” I complain, sifting through paper after paper. “Calm down! It’s not like it’s that important!” James says, sitting next to me. “You’re kidding right? This is so important! It’s our wedding for God sakes. How many times are we going to get married James? Once,” I say, sighing, “This is stressing me out.” “Okay, I’ll help, what do you have so far?” James asks, looking over my shoulder. “The guest list,” I say helplessly. “So you need the date and the time right? Then we can go get the invitations printed?” James says excitedly. “Well we could do the date, but we need the place too,” I say. “What about that place that your parents got married at?” James suggests. “No, that’s too traditional. I want to do it outside,” I say, “What about at Lake Michigan?” “So you want to do it in a warm month?” James asks. “What about in a month that June, Ethan, Patrick, Elise, and Emma can be part of it, so when they’re not in school,” I ask. The rest of James’s family didn’t move with him to Illinois, but they promised they would drive up for graduations, and weddings, and any type of shower (bridal, or baby.) “So June will be the flower girl, Ethan will be the ring bearer, Luke will be the best man and the maid of honor will be Fee, right?” James says, looking over the papers. “Yeah, that sounds right,” I turn to look at James, “How’s August 15th?” “At three o’clock?” James smiles. “That sounds perfect!” I say excitedly, “You’re making this so easy.”

          “Okay, brides’ mates,” James says, “We need names.” “Fee will be maid of honor, Emma, Jillian, and Elise. What about the groom’s men?” I explain. “Um, best man will be Joey, he said he was coming for sure, than Patrick and Luke, and my cousin Kyle,” James explains. He stares at me for a second, and then swallows hard, “Who… Who’s going to walk you down the aisle?” I sit a little less straight, “I- I don’t know…” “It doesn’t matter who you chose, it’s all up to you,” James says, laying his hand on mine. “Okay let’s do something else,” I say. “We don’t have anything else to do, it’s all done,” James says gently. “I want both,” I look up at him. “Are you sure?” James says. I nod, “Positive.” “Well okay. Want me to call them and ask or do you want to?” James says, standing. “Can you?” I ask quietly. “Of course,” he kisses the top of my head, “I’ll be right back.” I sigh to myself; this is a ton harder than I thought it would ever be.        

          “So?” I ask when James sits down next to me. “They agreed,” James smiles. “Thank you for doing that,” I hug him. “I told you, I’ll do anything for you if you promise to do the same,” James says, pulling me up next to him. I clear my throat, “I have something to tell you.” He looks at me, “What is it?” “I… I’m pregnant,” I mumble. “What?” James says, holding me at arm’s length. “I am pregnant,” I say louder. He stares at me for a second, then breaks out in a huge smile, “That’s great!” My eyes get wide, “Seriously? I’m going to have to quit school and you just started your job, we can barely afford this place, how are we going to support a child?” He puts his hands on my shoulders, “No, no this is great Elizabeth, and you’re on your last year of college right? How much time could we possibly have? It’s February now, so you’ll be 6 months along on our wedding right, we could have your bridal and baby shower in the same week! You’ll be done with school in August and you’re going to work at a school that offers daycare anyways right? So it will be free?” “Uh, yeah. Yeah, I guess so, but you and your job…” I say. “My job? What, you don’t think working at a car work shop has its perks? Everyone we hang out with are my work friends, I make plenty money to support you and a baby. Elizabeth, this is perfect okay? Just go with it,” James smile, he seems genuinely excited. “Well, okay,” I can’t help but smile back.

Wedding Day, August 15th            

          “I’m fat, and bloated, and sweaty, and the babies are killing me ankles!” I cry to my mother and future mother-in-law. “Look, you’re always beautiful and James sees it along with everyone else, that’s why he’s marrying you sweetie,” Mom says soothingly. “Yeah,” Laura cuts in, “We all know how much James loves you, honey.” I wipe my face so Mom can do my makeup, while Laura pulls my hair into and uncomfortable pony tail that she is going to curl and pin up. “Are you done yet?” I whine. My dress is tight around my belly and cuts into my sides; I just want to go change into sweatpants and eat ice cream. “Yes, I’m done. Laura are you done?” Mom says, stepping back to observe me. “I am now,” I can hear Laura say behind me. “Come on and look,” Mom helps me up so I can walk to the full length mirror. Every ache, pain, complaint, everything washes away. My hair is pinned up perfectly, my makeup makes me look like I’m glowing (maybe that’s the baby’s doing) and the dress hugs my 26 week pregnant with twins body perfectly, or as perfectly as it can. The only thing that could make this moment any better is if James were here. This is the first time in my whole life that I can honestly say that I feel beautiful.

          The wedding was almost as perfect as I felt. Our reception was only a couple of hours because I was extremely tired and sore. Back at home, James and I sat around and ate ice cream like I had wanted to earlier and looked over baby names.

“Okay, both the same letter or different?” James asks, flipping to the pink section. “I want them to either rhyme or to have the same letter,” I say looking over his shoulder. “Tomorrow want to do the nursery?” James asks. “Depends if we can find names or not,” I shrug. “How about Lauren and Lynn?” James suggests. “Those are such common names,” I sigh. “Aubrey and Ashlyn?” James says. “I like Raelyn,” I say. “How about Ashlyn and Raelyn, and we can call them Ash and Rae?” James smiles and looks over at me. I smile, “I guess we’re painting tomorrow.”

          “Are you awake?” I whisper, turning to my side. “Yeah, what’s up?” James says, turning to face me. “I can’t sleep,” I sigh. James studies my face for a second, “Remember when I took you to the beach for the first time in Florida with your sisters, and Elise brought you and Emma popsicles because Emma got salt water in her eyes?” “I remember that. Remember when you let me cry to you about how much I missed Fee?” I smile to myself in the dark. “How could I forget that?” James moves around and I feel his side of the bed rise, and the light turns on, “Did you notice this today?” I sit up and take his hand, “You still have your promise string!” “I told you I would never take it off,” James smiles, standing to turn the light off. I roll over into a more comfortable position and try to sleep.

          “James,” I call, not wanting to get up. “What?” he calls back, from which sounds like it’s from the kitchen. I groan and roll out of bed and waddle down the hallway. “I didn’t want to get out of bed, I wanted to know where you were,” I say, plopping down next to him on the kitchen stool. “I’m here,” James says, clicking away at his laptop. “What are you doing?” I ask. “I’m looking for cribs and paint,” James pushes his glasses higher on his nose. I love when he wears his glasses, even though he only wears them when he’s reading. “Oh right, we’re supposed to go out and do that. Can we paint it orange? I know traditionally it’s pink, but orange is brighter and I like it,” I say, tapping my fingers on the counter. “Anything you want, white and orange themed nursery, sounds good,” James nods, closing his laptop, “You want to shower first?”

“No, that’s too dark,” I sigh, pulling out different paint samples. “Hey, what about this one?” “How come you always find the most perfect things?” I ask, taking a gallon and the sample up to the paint counter. “I’m going to look for light fixtures, I’ll be over there,” I point and James nods. There are so many, lining the celling. “Find one you like?” James walks over, carrying a gallon of paint. “Uh, not really. What do you think?” I ask. “I think we should wait, because we may not be at this house for very long, you know?” James says, wrapping his arm around me and leads me to the front. “Yeah, I guess,” I shrug.

          “What is your job?” James smiles. It’s the next day, after the paint had dried and James is putting together two white cribs. “Look, I am carrying the two things that you will hold precious in this world, shut your mouth,” I sneer back, but smile. “Oh please. Come make me,” James laughs. “I would if I could,” I say, throwing my hands up in the air. “But you can’t,” James sneaks a look at me from under his shaggy hair. “Oh ha-ha,” I roll my eyes. “Done with one, one to go,” James says, setting up the white frame up on its legs. “It’s so cute! I’m going to get the sheets and animals from the family room,” I say as James puts the mattress into its spot in the frame. I waddle out into the family room to mounds of varying organs and whites. I carry in handfuls after handfuls of teddy bears and various stuffed animals, then plop the sheets and crib covering on top of all of that. “Want to do that so I can go get some water?” I motion to the sheets. “Sure,” James pulls sheets out of their container and covers the mattresses.

              The nursery is painted orange, minus one wall which we left white, the two white cribs are each against an orange wall, and they face each other. Each crib had Winnie the pooh designs on the sheets and crib covering, and they each have a Winnie the Pooh stuffed bear, along with other animals. Then the changing table is against the white wall, which is stacked with diapers. The closet is filled to the brim with baby clothes and shoes and strollers and baby carriers and blankets and other baby needs. “It’s looks so good!” I hug James (to the best of my abilities) and rest up for the impending babies.