Dawn of the Duchess

14. Beautiful Mountain View

"I am going to murder you. I am going to murder you slowly with a rusty chisel!"

"Ah." Titus nodded solemnly. "So your virtue was lost, and you wish for revenge. I can understand that. Any virgin would—"

He ducked just in time to evade the small decorative porcelain figurine that came flying at his head.

"Now, now, there's no need for that. I'm perfectly willing to take responsibility for my actions and—"

He ducked again, barely avoiding the ornate candle holder meant to skewer him.

"Hey, you haven't even heard about the result of our mission! You wouldn't want to accidentally harm me and jeopardize the health and safety of innocent little children, would you?"

"No." Karim's fists clenched and unclenched. "There would be nothing accidental about it."

"Ehem." Cautiously, Titus took a step back. "There's no need for this kind of aggression..."

"Agreed." Karim's hand landed on his sabre hilt. "I can think of better kinds of aggression to use in this situation."

"Um..."

"But, as much as it pains me to admit it," Karim continued in a low growl, "you are right. We have work to do. So, let us leave this place and find a more suitable location for this discussion, shall we?"

"Ah." Titus breathed a sigh of relief. "Excellent!"

Together, they left the casino, Titus making sure to convincingly stagger and sway on the way out, even breaking into a little drunken song for a minute. Once they were outside and well away from the den of iniquity—which, while a horrendous place of sin, Titus had to admit had really good booze—they found a little café, ordered one cup each and waited until the waiter had disappeared.

"So," Karim enquired, his face grim. Or at least as grim as a face could look with traces of lipstick still visible on one cheek. "How did things go?"

"Excellent!" Titus responded, nibbling on a croissant.

"Is that so?"

"Mmm-hmm!" Taking another bite, he nodded enthusiastically. "I lost all my friend's money at roulette, sold a little fellow to a depraved sexual deviant, and you know what's best of all?"

"Fortunately, no. But I get the feeling you're about to tell me."

Grinning, Titus held up several shiny black tickets with silver cursive writing. "I got these. Special invitations for an illegal slave auction. Patrick will be so thrilled!"

***

Lord Patrick Day watched with twitching brows as his servants rushed through the garden behind his house with wheelbarrows full of...

Well, he preferred to refer to it as "fertilizer". Using that word made it so much easier not to focus on what the stuff actually was.

He had to hand it to Amy. She certainly was talented at taking revenge on people. Amazingly talented, in fact, considering he suspected she had placed this "present" here before he even did anything annoying enough to warrant revenge. How very "generous" of her.

"Oh, just you wait," he growled, marching up and down in front of the French windows that provided the view of Mont Merde, to put it in French. "Just you wait till I get my hands on you!"

"I'm afraid I shall have to decline, My Lord," Griffiths replied from behind him. "I am not interested in that kind of relationship. And besides, there is the little fact it is illegal."