The Cracked Doll

~Blinded By Beauty~

...not me just now relaxing that this is not sad......

will shit🤡

------------------------------

A week had passed and Toru still had no idea what to say. His pride shriveled at the idea of apologizing. But his heart ached to remember how cruel he had been.

He was completely lost as to how to properly treat the enigma that was koshi sugawara. No longer a tool, no longer a dog, now he was a grown man. A man who was sweet to his mother understood his pain, and would never be anything but honest with him.

Enemies he could deal with. Subordinates and employees were easy to manage. But with him, he was lost. It really shouldn't have been such a shock when he walked into his mother's sitting room, came face to face with his mother and him , and found he had no idea what to say.

They all stood in silence for a moment as Toru attempted to speak. It took a few awkward stumbles but eventually, something intelligible came out. "I... would it be alright if I were to join you this afternoon?"

"Of course, my dear, the gardens look lovely this morning." The look of joy on his mother's face was nearly all he needed to forget his anxiety, but he wanted to hear those words from another as well.

(pussy ass simp- (plz don't report this book...plz don't💀))

"Koshi?" He did his best to hide any hope from his voice. The rejection was always easier to handle if he could maintain his veneer of apathy.

"Yes, of course, your mother would appreciate that greatly." A simple response and not technically rejection, but his careful wording made Toru's heart sink.

(what in the first grade crush is this- 😭y'all plz im sorry-)

He followed silently as they went about their usual routine and made their way out to the gardens. They were all quiet at first. Toru helped his mother down the main stairs that led to the garden. There was a moment of tense confusion as Toru tried to take Koshi's usual spot behind the wheelchair after helping his mother to sit.

"Please, allow me." Toru indicated the wheelchair and tilted his head in supplication. After a long moment, he looked up to the hazel-brown eyes watching him with uncertainty.

(manz dont know how a wheelchair works but is a Naval Captain😂y'all plz I be making him dumb dumb-)

"Koshi, you can walk next to me." Mrs.oikawa broke the tension between them.

"Yes, of course." he nodded. Toru let out a breath as they started to walk amongst the flowers.

The chatter between the two sweat people was quiet and pleasant. Koshi's tension was obvious, but they all did their best to ignore it. Toru found himself lost in the beauty of the blooming flowers and the beauty of the man walking amongst them.

(me in the back: "FUCKING SIMMMPPP!")

Koshi moved with silent grace observing each new patch of flowers and manicured shrubbery. he was so very different from that soulless tool he had found in the North. he was even different from the fearless boy standing on the roof of the train car facing a rocket head-on.

Toru wasn't a fool. He realized his feelings for her were turning into something... more. Likely he had already burned that bridge a hundred times over, but he was not a man to retreat. Despite the odds, he knew he had to do something.

(not you getting with your dead sister bf💀🤚)

"What do you think, Toru?" His mother's voice broke through the storm of thought. He looked up to find Koshi watching him closely.

"Uh, sorry. I was..."Toru gasped for an explanation, but couldn't find his voice.

"Oh, no bother my dear. You must have been taken by all this beauty." His mother laughed. Two sets of confused eyes turned towards the older woman as she chuckled.

"Yes."Toru turned back to face Koshi. He watched a light flush color the young man's pale complexion.

"Well, I'm afraid this heat has done me in for the afternoon. Toru, would you mind seeing Koshi to the door?" His mother's knowing brown eyes watched his reaction closely, and he knew he was trapped.

"Of course." Toru bowed. He didn't dare look at Koshi.

Quietly they made their way back to the house. Mrs.oikawa bid them both good afternoon and there they stood, alone, walking to the front door. Toru knew this was his chance, and he wasn't about to let it pass.

He stopped under the front staircase, conveniently blocked from prying eyes. Koshi stood silently to his side, just a few inches away. Toru steeled himself as he turned to face his problem.

"Koshi. Last week... what you said..." He took his mechanical hands delicately on his own. He placed a gentle kiss on his metal knuckles, unable to meet his eyes. "Thank you."

"I only told you what was true. Your mother loves you very much."Koshi was looking down at where he had kissed his hand. He wondered if he wished he could feel the warmth of his touch.

"Yes, I... I find that I have a difficult time expressing my emotions." He kept hold of Koshi's hands but met his eyes. They shimmered with the barest hint of emotion.

"I understand that very much, Captain." The words made his heart sting painfully. For all they had been through, for all he knew about this strange, beautiful creature before him, he was the one person who truly did understand.

"Please, call me Toru." He begged. He wanted things to change, he wanted more.

"Very well, Toru." Koshi withdrew his hands, and he felt a small flicker of hope. "I will be going now. I have to work in the morning." His face was a mixture of confusion. He took it as a good sign. He had seen Koshi's face marked with sorrow, with pain, and right now he was feeling a fair bit of confusion himself. It was nice to not be alone for once.

"Goodnight, Koshi."

"Goodnight, Tooru."
————————————————————
The next part of the story will be out July 10
I'm looking to you sugawara_addict