I'm Marilyn Monroe

Perfect

This is probably my less "famous" fic but it's the one I'm most proud of.

Writing this was hard and at the same time it was amazing for me.

I don't know if it's any good but no matter what this fic will continue, and I'm proud of it.

Well, I don't own Marilyn, Ivy, Smash or any of the songs in it. I own nothing beside my writing. This is fanfiction.xx

“Fifteen minutes Miss. Monroe” a girl's voice let her know from the dressing room's door. She glanced herself once more in the mirror, perfect curly blonde hair gently touching her bare shoulders, the right amount of makeup emphasizing her features.

“Perfect” she decided finally, maybe she wasn't perfect but she looked perfect and she had learned long ago that that was all that mattered anyway.

Perfect was the exact word to describe her, or at least everyone thought that way, no one ever called her beautiful, no one complimented her for her smile, no one ever smiled by hearing her laugh, no, she wasn't beautiful, she wasn't kind, she wasn't smart, she was called perfect and after a few years she couldn't find another word to describe herself, after all, no one else had been able to either.

Her pink dress hugged her curves just the right way, long enough to look like a lady, short enough to show you the woman beneath it.

Looking at the pills on the table she let out a deep sigh, she didn't want to use them, she wanted to go out there and sing like she never sang before, she wanted to be extraordinary for once, to feel like that at least for a few minutes, but when the sound of the crowd, waiting for her out there, reached her ears she grabbed the pills and swallowed them instantly.

“Five minutes Miss. Monroe”

One last look at the mirror, one last deep breath. After closing her dressing room's door she was facing the stairs that lead to the stage, the crowd of fans was loud, anxious, hungry. She was already feeling the effect of the pills, feeling herself relaxing immediately and a sudden relief took over her. She knew she wouldn't be able to sing after taking those pills, she knew it wouldn't be extraordinary, but she would still be perfect wouldn't she? After all, no one was there to hear her sing, they weren't there to hear her, they were there to see her.

Only three more steps to climb and she would be on stage.

One, remember to smile...

Two, walk straight ahead...

Three, be perfect...

Lights, music, applause.

“Ladies and gentlemen, Miss. Marilyn Monroe!”

Ivy let go of the pills and turned her back at the mirror. Closing her eyes she let her hands traveling her face, her fingers touching every line, caressing every slight imperfection. The tears were still running down her face, and she wasn't even trying to stop them.

She was all alone, no need to pretend, no need to keep the masquerade.

“My mother bought it second hand...” her voice was trembling, the notes were not right she knew it, but she just kept singing.

“And with each note, we both would smile

Forgetting who we are, and all the pain

Would simply fly away...”

She was second hand, she had been the second choice for so long, but when she was all alone, singing like that, even though her voice was trembling, even though her makeup was ruined, when she was able to sing, there was no one else to take her place, no one else to follow, no one else to lead.

Finally her voice sounded clear, strong, not perfect, but beautiful.

Ivy kept her eyes closed during the whole song, and the only thing on her mind was her mom, isn't it peculiar? The only person she had tried so hard her whole life to get away from, was the only one on her mind when she sang.

Leigh Conroy, that's a name no one could ever forget, not even Ivy, no matter how hard she had tried in the past. Being the daughter of the great Leigh Conroy was for many an honor, but she never wanted Leigh Conroy, she wanted a mom. Just someone to hold her through the nightmares instead of being on stage every single night away from her. Someone to tell her how good she was even when she got the notes wrong, someone able to be proud of someone like her.

But her mother was never able to stop being Leigh Conroy not even for a few hours. Looking back though it was Leigh Conroy who brought Ivy to the theatre for the first time, it was her who made her love the stage more than anything else, to respect the characters, the story and most of all the audience.

After so many years trying to run away from her mother's shadow, it was her mom's face the only thing between her and a hand full of pills.