𝐩𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐚 || 𝘳.𝘢.𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬

030. the first fatality

"Her whole family's dead." Maria whispers, clinging to James more. "That could've been us James."

"It's not, all right?" James says, stoking his sister's hair and sharing a look with Sirius. "We're fine, see. We're not dying any time soon M."

A loud beeping sound echoes through the ward from the machine next to Clarissa's bed and Maria gets up as healers come over quickly and begin doing things to try and stop something. Maria has her hand clamped over her mouth as James pulls her shoulders so she's looking into his chest. The blaring noise abruptly stops and the healers look down at her sadly, shaking their heads.

"She's gone."

The youngest Potter's breath gets caught half way up her throat, tears already falling down her cheeks as they begin to wheel Clarissa's bed away, Maria frantically tried to follow but James quickly grabs her arms and brings her back into his chest as she begins to sob. The heartbreaking, quiet cries of the two girls pain the quartet of seventeen year old boys and Remus quickly pulls Danielle into a hug, Maria falling into James' arms, giving up on trying to go after Clarissa.

Clarissa is dead.

The same sentence echoes through Maria's mind as James sinks into a chair, Maria still clinging to him, sat sideways on his lap, her face buried into her brother's shoulder as he rubs her back softly.
Sure Clarissa and Maria had this sarcastic banter that everyone used to think was arguing, and they were always bickering over things in the dorm room but they were best friends.

Maria is slowly starting to understand just how serious the war is, and how much it's going to cost them. How many people will have to die? She can't imagine losing James or Peter, Sirius orRemus.

Or Regulus.

Clarissa is dead.

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Regulus' heart broke when Maria had knocked on his and Stan's dormitory's door with tears in her eyes and the marks of previous tears on her face, puffy red eyes and a pained expression. He had instantly pulled her into his arms, knowing the worst had happened. Stan was in the common room at the time, staying up studying with Alyssa for a test they have tomorrow in astronomy.

Now, the couple are lay on the emerald sheets of Regulus' bed, Regulus' fingers tracing up and down Maria's thigh softly as her leg rests over his torso, folding onto him. Tears have stained his grey hoodie, but he couldn't care less as him and Maria whisper quietly to each other, her forehead resting on his jawline softly.

"She was seventeen, Reg." Maria whispers hoarsely and Regulus sighs, moving slightly to place a long kiss on her forehead. "How could someone do something like that—death eater or not?"

"Some people are terrible, Ria." Regulus mumbles, his thumb stoking her thigh as his hand rests just above her knee. "Dumbledore said it himself, only. . .dark times aren't coming, they're already here."

"Promise me you won't leave me." Maria whispers, listening to his soft, calming heartbeat as her head lies on his chest. Regulus lets out a quiet breath, his other hand coming and playing with her fingers, softly intertwining them with his own as he lips his dry lips.

"As long as you promise me."

"I promise." Maria sniffles, looking up at him and he smiles comfortingly at her, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, his warm fingers tracing on her skin.
She leans into his touch, leaning up and gently pressing her lips on his, the salty tears mix with their kiss. It's not like the other's they've shared, those where passionate and lustful, this is just sweet, savouring every small touch, memorising the precious feeling of his lips on hers.

"Come here." Regulus mumbles against her lips, lifting her up slightly so she sits up and he gets to his feet, helping her up as she frowns in confusion but he simply pulls her out of the dormitory and through the empty common room — only occupied by Alyssa and Stan who give them small smiles — and out through the portrait hole.

They arrive on the astronomy tower, the cool breeze fluttering through their hair and Regulus pulls her over to the railings, near the wall and sits down, pulling Maria to sit between his legs, her shoulders falling back onto his chest and her head back on his shoulder. The duo stare up for a few minutes, at the moon, shining brightly in the clear night sky, surrounded by millions of glimmering stars.

At this moment, nothing else matters. In this very moment, they're just two sixteen year old teenagers with their whole lives ahead of them, both about to be thrown into a war that they're already losing, both going to have to make a choice, both about to be tested.
But right now, all that matters is that they're two stupid teenagers, falling hopelessly for each other underneath the stars.

"The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" Regulus whispers in her ear and Maria's eyes focus only on the moon now, it's now quite full yet but is close to, standing out above them.

"The stars are too." Maria whispers back, playing with his rings on his hand that rests on her stomach gently.

"I'm sorry, Ria, about everything that's happening." Regulus mumbles, resting his chin on her shoulder and Maria sighs, leaning further back onto him.

"It's a war, Reggie." The brunette breathes, sounding like she doesn't want to believe it. "Clary wasn't the first, and I have a feeling she certainly won't be the last."

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Hi! Oh my gosh, over 35k reads, how?!
I really hope you're enjoying this fic, and I'm sorry for always updating so early in the mornings, my sleep schedule is terrible!

also, I've changed Lily's face claim from Karen Gillan to Sophie Skelton because I feel like she fits it more and personally, I see Karen more like a younger Molly, but you can picture whoever you wish!

I can't believe I just killed Clarissa off!

I'm so ready for everything to get darker though, also very scared :)

thank you so much for reading this!

~ Grace x