beautiful betrayals | eren jaeger

11.

"you- missed me?" you stammered, feeling your body begin to wobble, your hands were visibly shaking. you were nervously looking at eren, waiting for it all to be over. you just wanted to go home, that was all. you didn't want to see eren, you didn't want to be on paradis, you wanted to go back home, maybe that alone could free you of half of the suffering you were cursed to endure.

eren began to shift from his spot once more, catching your attention once more. his footsteps echoed throughout the room, making his way closer to you. you mentally panicked, backing up until your back hit a wall suddenly, trapping you in eren's prescience. you felt your heart race, it was almost as if anyone in the room could hear how loud it was beating against your chest.

you then felt a large hand rest on your cheek, your body jerked up, moving away from his touch. you couldn't tell the emotion behind eren's eyes, his expression remained blank, it was almost as if he expected you to flinch your hand away from him. there was silence a few moments after until he reached his hand up to touch you again.

you were overcome with all sorts of emotions, cornered against a wall with no way out, having to face one of your biggest fears. you felt your body begin to shake, your fists clenched at your sides, your breathing began to become rapid.

finally, you felt his hand rest against firmly against your cheek once more. it had been so long since he'd done that, you almost couldn't recall how it felt, it was a small sense of comfort that you'd been longing for, the partial act of closure calmed your troubled soul, maybe this was okay. it felt far from right, but it was comforting.

"why are you doing this?" you suddenly questioned, looking up to meet eren's eyes. you knew now, no amount of act of closure would really mean anything to you, you weren't welcome here anymore. you were an enemy. a slave. it deeply pressured your chest, the feeling of disappointment making its way across your face.

"just tell me what you want from me," you finally broke the eye contact with him, looking down at your feet in silence. you could almost feel your eyes gloss over, you didn't want the moment to end just yet, you wanted to say so much to him, but you knew the words you'd want to say would go unspoken, that's how it always was with him. he rendered you speechless.

you no longer pledged your loyalty to paradis, nor eren anymore. you belonged to the marleyan military, fondling with eren was one of your biggest mistakes, and now you had to live with it for the rest of your days, but for now, you wanted to savor what he offered to you, to indulge in it, one final time, what you've been longing for all this time was now right in front of you.

it seemed he completely avoided your question, releasing his hand from your cheek while keeping eye contact with you. "follow me." he plainly said, backing away from you as if nothing had ever happened before. there it was, the sharp pang in your chest from before.

you didn't know why you felt this way, you were constantly fighting with the logical and unrealistic scenarios in your head, but you just nodded at his words and followed eren out of the small room and into the hallways. it was almost suffocatingly silent, the walls seemed to be caving in on you, never once letting you stop for a breath of air.

eren stopped by a door, opening it to reveal a space room inside. gabi sat in the corner, with her knees to her chest, shaking slightly. amongst seeing you, she sprung up from her position and ran into your side, clenching your clothes tightly in her embrace. "y/n! you're okay!" the girl smiled, snuggling herself into your chest.