𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙱𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚎 𝙰𝚏𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚛 || 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙿𝙻𝙴𝚃𝙴𝙳

Chapter Fifteen

"Does 11:30 work?" I question and he nods writing it down on the sticky note, "Maybe if you didn't have plans with your date we could go out for lunch?" I mumble the last bit feeling the heat creep the back of my neck.

"I can't sorry," his words crack my heart a bit, "I have lunch with my date," of course he does I feel tears prick my eyes.

I take a deep breath in trying not to cry in front of him, "Yeah right, of course, no that's all good, anyway I should probably start work on the outfits for the other client instead of going out for lunch," my words don't sound very convincing to me, and I can tell Landon isn't convince himself.

He sits there looking at me for a bit, "Okay cool," his words break my heart even more, but I remain silent staring at the burger in my hand.

"Yep."

The room falls into awkward silence it was deafening. I shift in my seat and place the burger on his desk. I glance up at Landon from under my eyelashes to see him looking at me in confusion as I take the top off the burger and place some chip on top, "You are not putting fries on your burger," his face is a pale green in disgust.

"Fries? No, chips yes," I correct him.

"Chips?" he looks at me with furrowed eyebrows and wide eyes, "Those are fries not chips sweetheart," I can't help but laugh at him.

"Fries are skinny Landon chips are thick," I wave a chip in front of his face.

He chuckles and shakes his head, "No chips are potato slice thinly and baked and fries are chopped up into strips and deep-fried," I watch as he takes a bite of his burger.

"They're chips and that is final," I huff and take a bite of my burger.

••••••

Time flies by with Landon typing away on his laptop and me sketching designs on my laptop. I glance up at him every now and then when he grumbles and groans, but we don't talk much. My heart still stings at the thought of him going out to lunch with another girl. It makes me sick to my stomach thinking about meeting her Wednesday. I look back over to Landon to see him staring at me. He is studying my emotions he must have felt the change again in my mood as soon I thought about Wednesday.

I close my laptop lid and stand up causing him to shift in his seat, "Do you know where the bathroom is?" I ask shifting awkwardly on my feet.

"Down the hall and to your right," he clasps his hands together leaning forward on his desk holding an intensified stare, "What's on your mind?" his question caught me off guard a bit... actually it caught me off a lot.

I fiddle with my hand and shift on my feet again not knowing what to say or do I just kind of stand there, "I need to go pee," I blurt out after a minute of silence, "Excuse me," I turn on my heel and rush out of the door.

Tears rush down my cheek as soon as I push the bathroom door open. I close it behind me and press my back against it letting gravity do its job pulling me down to the ground. I hug my knees to my chest and rest my head on my knees, "Oh Charlie Bear don't cry," I shudder at the sound of her voice, "It's your fault you made yourself vulnerable around him, you let yourself fall for him like you said you wouldn't, and it has only been two weeks pathetic," she spits on me, "You're pathetic Charlie weak, a coward even," this isn't about Landon anymore.

I let Harley spit her venom at me, I have no power to fight the voice in my head right now. I can't deal with everything anymore. This was meant to be my fresh start, I was meant to be happy, drama-free not jumping at my shadows not seeing or hearing dead people not reliving moments that caused me trauma I just want it all to go away I just want to be normal- I hate it, I hate it so much.

She gets bored after five minutes and finally leaves me alone, but I can't move, my body is frozen on the ground cold. I feel drained, I feel like crying more but my body cannot produce another tear, so I just sit there on the cold tile bathroom floor curled up in a little ball hugging myself tightly. At this point I don't know what to do, going to therapy made me feel better but I can only share so much, I can only tell the one story everyone knows, the one where the murderer is still out there, and no one knows who he is or she or it. That's what everyone knows and thinks but I know the killer, Kayla knows the killer, My ex's-parents know the killer and even my ex knows the killer, but we can't do anything about the information because the killer has been unlinked from the murder placing it all on Kayla. It will always come back to Kayla.

My thoughts are screaming louder than the outside world. How I nor Kayla can dare say a thing about that night or she'll go down for it and I know she will, I'll be protected because there is no footage of me, and he's still crazily in love with me. He would never let me get close to being behind bars, but he will torture me in any way he can.

I finally pull myself up off the floor and drag my body over to the sink. I almost scream at the person staring at me in the mirror. She doesn't look like me, her skin has paled, her eyes are swollen, and can barely open. My nose is dripping with snot my cheeks are the only colour left on my face. I'm disgusted with myself, I hate the girl who is looking at me, I left this bitch in Australia... well I thought I did, but she is back, and it hasn't even been a month or anything it's only been two weeks.

I continue staring at myself in the mirror watching some colour slowly come back to my face my eyes calming down a bit. I splash some cooling water on my face cleaning off the snot, the dried tears. I turn off the faucet as there's a soft knock on the door, "Charlie-Rose," his voice comes small and soft, "Are you alright you've been in here for almost an hour," I look up to the clock above the mirror. Shit! I have been crying for an hour straight!

I wipe my face and take a few deep breaths before walking over to the door and opening it a crack, "Hi, yeah I'm all good," I give him a weak smile and push the door open more slipping out into the hall.

"You've been crying, why?" he noticed my swollen eyes and flushed cheeks.

I wipe under my eye and look at him, "No?" I plaster a smile on my face, "I'm fine just girl stuff," I go to walk off when Landon grasps me pushing me back against the wall.

"Don't play the fucking girl card on me," his tone is firm and low, "Talk to me Charlie-Rose, tell me what's going on in that mind of yours let me in please I want to help you," he cups my face and my body react instantly leaning into his touch.

"Please be patient with my Landon I just have some things I'm not ready to talk about yet, but I will if you don't give up on me," I bring our foreheads together, "Just promise me you won't give up on me," we hold eye contact our body pressed together giving each other warmth and comfort.

Landon licks his lip looking for his words, "Charlie-Rose, I promise you I won't give up on you," I smile at his first promise to me, "As long as you promise as soon as you're ready, you to come to me," he pecks my lips, "Promise me that," he pecks my lips again.

"I promise you, Landon I'll talk to you when I'm ready," I inch my lips closer to his, "Thank you I whisper on his lips, "Thank you for being patient," I push my lips on his.

The kiss is slow and sweet. Our lips moved in sync as our tongues lazily met in the middle. Landon holds my face with both hands and my hands fist his shirt as our tongues flick over each other. We part our lips from each other catching our breaths however we still stay in place holding each other resting our foreheads on top of each other.

The three deadly words come to my lips in a rush but before my mouth could dare say them, I crash my lips back onto Landon's smudging the words away. He jerks back a bit from my sudden movement but quickly reacts. This kiss didn't last long I pull away from him once the urge of those three words passed, "It's getting late shouldn't we leave?" I ask.

"Yeah, let's go back to mine for the night," I nod taking his hand in mine as we walk back to his office grabbing our stuff and heading back to his place to rest for the night.

I don't know if Landon will be able to hold his promise he made to me today, neither do I. I don't know if I can bring myself to tell him about my past if I can tell him what goes on in my head, what I see. It makes me sound crazy, and I don't want him to think I'm crazy, but maybe I am.