silence - nct, norenmin

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"honey, are you sure this is a good idea? i'm not sure our baby is ready to face this again." a worried mother spoke, holding onto her husband's hand firmly.

"i hate this idea as much as you do, darling. but i'm ready to accept it if that's what he wants." the husband assured caressing his wife's hand.

"i want what is best for him..."

"i do too." the husband told. "and i'm sure he knows that going to this school is what is best for him."

jaemin sighed, walking from his hiding spot to his room where he laid on his back on the bed.

finally. his parents had accepted.

he couldn't be happier – well, he could be less worried actually.

jaemin had turned 18 a few days before.

he had celebrated this 18th birthday on his own, with his parents.

there was no loud singing. no big party. no dozens of drunk teenagers dancing around the house. no big present that everyone had helped financing. no. nothing of that.

it had only been jaemin, his mother and his father, around a homemade cake – on which there were only 15 candles because his parents had forgotten to buy new ones, and jaemin had assured them it was sufficient.

pretty much pitiful for a 18th birthday.

but what could he ask for more?

this birthday had just been the same as the previous 8.

dull, no fun, and saddening...

life had taken a U-turn since the accident.

it was as if jaemin had had a second birth, at the age of 10, which had marked the arrival of a completely new boy. a boy no one thought jaemin could be.

jaemin was a bubbly boy. not a shy one.

he was friendly. not lonely.

charming. not sulking.

happy. not depressed.

that accident...

jaemin recalls every single second of it.

if only he could forget about it.

if only he could stop living the same scene over and over again in his nightmares...

this accident had deprived him of everything he had.

his friends.

his reputation.

his happiness.

his beauty.

his voice...

jaemin was a selective mute.

he hadn't always been.

no. he became like that after the accident.

he hated this condition he was in.

but he had no power to control it.

he couldn't speak freely anymore.

he always stayed silent.

he couldn't approach people anymore.

he always stayed alone.

he couldn't live a normal life anymore...

"jaemin?" his mother knocked softly on the door before opening it gently. "do you prefer having fish or chicken for dinner?"

jaemin thought for a second, judging the pros and cons of each ingredient.

but his choice was quickly made.

"fish."

"okay, i'll call you when it's ready!"

"thanks mom..."

jaemin's mother closed the door behind her back, leaving jaemin all alone in his cold bedroom.

the same questions kept turning around in his mind.

why couldn't he raise his voice when he was around people?

why could he talk for hours to his parents?

why was he scared of crowdy places?

why couldn't he stand seeing people shirtless?

why didn't his voice want to get out when he was outside?

why did he find himself ugly?

why had this bully done that?

those many questions were haunting him.

and sadly, he couldn't find any reasonable answer to them.

he wished for his life to be easier.

he wished for his life to be better.

he wished for his life to be the same as before.

and he kept wishing, but it never occurred...