beautiful betrayals | eren jaeger

6.

but something troubled him from doing so, and you didn't know what, or why he would spare you pitiful glances seeing you cooped into the corner of the room, hugging your knees. he'd known that if it was all those years ago, you wouldn't stop fighting, you wouldn't stop until you found a way out— for the both of you. you'd probably give him a speech about something dumb or beg him to join you and sasha whilst the two of you snuck food and he'd keep watch.

but, how the times change, it seems you've completely given up, only giving nothing but a sad stare at the wall, hugging yourself gently to keep yourself warm. "your hair looks kinda cool like that!" hange beamed, mimicking the style his hair was in, eren stared at her agitatedly, sighing softly to himself. hange hasn't changed since then, and yet you could say they look like they've matured a lot since then, but at the same time, nothing changed much.

looking back at eren, you began to reminisce the moment you first saw him. it was a bitter sweet moment meeting him for the first time, he smiled brightly at you and didn't hesitate to give you a strong lecture on how you're both going to kill all the titans to save humanity when you two grew up, that was the eren you knew. it was the eren you fell in love with, the eren that made you swoon and sweep for him, without even trying.

you weren't so sure about that now, looking at him now, he's never lost the ability to astound you by his unique beauty. recalling seeing him at sasha's grave, his hair flowing gently with the wind. he looked menacing in every way, but at the same time, he held astounding composure, and that's what made him beautiful to you. you remembered what he told you the day before you were forced to flee paradis island due to reiner revealing himself as the armored titan, as well as revealing you and bertholdt.

"maybe when all this is over, let's live and grow old together." you were a fool, brainwashed into thinking what you were doing was right, and yet you lived two lives, and now the memories continue to haunt you even now, you felt a sting at your heart for a split second, oh how you missed eren. you missed him so dearly. you missed those long nights with him, you missed him helping you with your odm gear, you missed everything about paradis.

you missed sasha, you missed jean, you missed connie, you missed hearing hange pour their heart out for their passion of titans. you missed hearing levi lecture you about being reckless with eren, you missed so desperately the feeling of safety he gave you, allowing you to drink tea with him and converse. everything was different now. now, you missed your home. you missed udo.

you couldn't go back, no matter how homesick you were, you knew on paradis, you were no longer an ally, now you were a traitor, a prisoner. you weren't wanted here, and they would use you like a slave, much like a pawn, using your knowledge of the marleyan military to their advantage.

you turned to hange, who was rambling on to eren, eren looked at them deep in thought side eyeing them. "what about gabi and falco? are they okay?" you placed your hands on the bars, shifting your gaze to hange's. hange stayed silent for a moment before nodding their head at you. "they're fine." you nodded slowly, looking down. "can i see them?" hange looked down at you, they seemed to pity you, how helpless you looked, if you'd ask eren, he'd probably say you'd look pathetic like that.

hange never answered your question, before babbling to eren once more. "about last night, why did you keep chanting 'fight.'" they mimicked the way he said the words 'fight', if you weren't so zoned out and cautious, you'd probably have bursted into laughter at the way to they mocked him repeatedly. "it's not normal to talk to yourself in the mirror like that," they remarked, pointing to you. "if i were y/n i would be creeped out, you're the only one who does that,"

eren suddenly, stood up and walked over to hange, grabbing them by the collar of their shirt. hange seemed taken aback at this, your eyes narrowed at eren. since when did he become so short tempered? you could hear hange struggle against eren's grip. "i can leave as i want to. i do what i want, when i want." you saw for a moment, eren began to spark, as if he were about to transform. you shielded yourself, afraid that he would, until you heard hange stumble backward, breathing heavily.

"you pervert!" they grabbed their chest, cursing profanities at eren, to which eren paid no mind to. "your recklessness is going to kill lots of people!" you heard their voice become distant, but you could muster to hear hange call eren an idiot. that he was. he was an idiot, driven by rage. but where was this rage leading him to? hange had mentioned that it was an intention to sacrifice historia, but what was it for? what could possibly be done about the rumbling?

what were they going to do to you? eren turned to you, his harsh gaze softening a bit. you analyzed him, sitting himself back down elegantly, one leg propped up, just like he sat before. yet again, he stared directly at you, not breaking the eye contact.

you clenched your hands together, gulping audibly. the air seemed thinner, just like before, it was torture to look at i him, he was tearing you apart just with his gaze, you could swear you'd seen him smile slightly. though his gaze was gentle, it held overwhelming power over you.

that was when you noticed he was chuckling, he hid his face between his hand. you perked up, shocked almost, feeling your chest clench and a gentle wave of heat rushed to your face. though, you felt confused by him, what was he laughing at? his chuckle reminded you of the time he nervously giggled to you when you both confessed, it made you feel comforted. you questioned why were you feeling these things in a situation like this.

what would udo think? siding with the "enemy"? what would reiner think? what would gabi say to you? how would falco react? all these thoughts raced your head, what ifs repeatedly plaguing your line of thought.

you didn't know, but you could sense that eren still had an inch of empathy in him, then again, he murdered your people and cost the death to your beloved brother, you couldn't say for sure.

whatever eren had up his sleeve, you needed to prepare yourself for, he wasn't the same person as before, he was more complex now, and you haven't the slightest idea of what he was going to do next.
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Sorry this chapter was kinda weak.. promise next chapter is going to be a bit more eventful, please enjoy and happy valentines day ty for the support mwah <3!!