Oizys
(/ˈoʊɪzɪs/; Ancient Greek: Ὀϊζύς) is the goddess of misery, anxiety, grief, and depression.
It hurts.
It's a feeling so suffocating, I can't breath properly. Sometimes I manage to forget it, and it travels to the back of my mind, but before I could grasp it, it comes back. Crashing down on me. It's necessary, it makes me feel, it makes me human. Even if I could get rid of it, I won't. Not if I was in the right mindset that is. The pain is necessary. For you to grow and develop you need to feel pain. What kind of a person would you be if you didn't ? Think of it, someone who never went through pain, how would that be...
My mind kills me sometimes.
My thoughts, they strangle me.
It could be in the most random moments, but they keep coming. They surround me and trap me, leaving no space for me to escape. Keeping me in the same spot for days. I drown in them. I keep gasping for air, I call for help. No one's there. Nobody can help.
I'm all alone with my worst enemy, my own thoughts. Deep down I know I give them the power to control, and torture me. But it's like I can't put them in a cage, I don't want to. I want them to accompany me so I'd feel less lonely. Even if it kills me. It makes me feel.
Is it so wrong ?
2/3/21
jodi
