Engines & Demons - The Undestined

Chapter 25ii

"It was not an intended distraction. Not really."

"So will you tell me how you are? I can see you are not fully recovered."

His wife sighed.

"I can feel my strength returning. I did not expect to feel such weakness. Grifford and Tahlia did not take so much out of me."

"I have spoken to Doctor Fos. She does not seem concerned."

"No, she assures me I will soon recover, but..."

Tahlessa turned away from him, tears suddenly glistening on her lashes where her eyes were closed tight.

"What is it?" asked Sir Kralaford, suddenly concerned.

"She tells me that I may not bear any more children."

She said it quickly, as though wanting the words to be away from her lips. Sir Kralaford wrapped his arms about her in a strong embrace and held her to him. He kissed her creased forehead.

"You have given me two sons and a daughter. I could not ask for more. Do not fret about this."

Tahlessa gave a deep sigh and wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I am sorry," she said. "You did not come to see me crying. I do not seem able to stop of late."

"Cry if you feel you must, but this is not a time for tears. This should be a time of happiness."

"Happiness! With war on the horizon again. If it comes, there will be plenty more tears shed before the summers return."

"War is not yet a certainty. Besides, I was referring to our new son. Surely this is not a time to be crying."

"I do not know why I cry. It is as though my mind is mired in a swamp and cannot raise itself up to the sunlight."

"Does he not give you joy?"

Tahlessa looked down at her sleeping baby, but no smile touched her lips.

"He does, of course, but I worry I will lose him like I have lost his brother."

"Grifford! Grifford is not lost."

"I feel as though he is lost to me! He has visited me every day since Kralmir came, but he barely speaks. He looks grim faced and sombre as always, and I have no way of knowing what troubles his heart save what I can find in speculation." She looked down at the peaceful face of Kralmir, still deep in sleep. "I sometimes think that children are a curse."

Sir Kralaford stood quickly and then knelt down in front of Tahlessa, gripping her arms in his hands. He stared into her eyes, willing her to look up at him.

"How can you say such a thing?"

"My children bring me so much joy, but also pain in equal measure. I worry for them now, but I also worry for their future and their safety. I do not want them growing up in war as I did."

"You must stop all this concern for our sons. They will both grow to be good men and be the greatest of knights. They will not fall in battle."

Tahlessa shook her head.

"You do not know that, and it is not you who has to stay behind, waiting to hear of the fate of your loved ones. I thought it bad when there was only you for my heart to strain for news of, but if my sons were to go with you I do not think I could survive it."

She did raise her eyes to meet his then, though the unfamiliar sorrow in them made it hard for him to hold her gaze.

"I do not like to see you talk this way. I need your strength beside me again if I am to prevent this war. With Lord Taine as Commander of the Order of the Heights, and the Clans under his control, we have a chance at keeping the peace that he and Lord Morath made."