If She Stays ↠ Sequel to All Over Again ➝ (A PeteZahHut FanFiction)

Chapter 3-- Nostalgia.

Onto discovering how long it will be until Aria wakes up, broke my heart.
The doctors told me that there is a 70% chance that she will wake up, in a matter of weeks, maybe even months.
but that 30% still remained.

That 30% will forever haunt me- it will scar me, it will ruin me, it will turn my heart very fragile with the possibility of breaking it all over again.
But, I have learned from my despair, and told myself that I would no longer mourn over her and fall into depression all over again.
However, that does not mean my heart no longer aches anymore. It just signifies that I will not put myself into harm, or attempt to take my life like I had the previous times.

Deciding that, was one thing. But I could still no longer eat, I still could no longer be happy, and I could still no longer reach out to anyone, I have yet again, blocked everyone out from my life, from communicating with me-- they still attempted to talk to me, I just didn't want to respond. I restricted myself to staying with Aria through day and night, because it was the only thing that mattered to me at the moment.

She laid in front of me, where I could calmly watch over her, but nothing ever happened, just me waiting for the day she wakes up.
Her face covered with cuts, her arms covered with bandages that covered her open wounds.

Open wounds; the memories flood back to my mind at the nostalgic feeling of that word.

----

It had been the day I had lost Kara, a sad filled day in which I lay in the hospital, recklessly mourning over what I had done.
I had no consent of what I had done to myself, because I was filled with sadness, and regret. The thought of killing myself would always come up to my mind, but I was too much of a coward to do so. I wanted to, I really did.
So many thoughts crept up into my mind, simply because I thought I had lost everything I could ever, want, and have.

My fear has always been starting all over again.
The thought of starting to love someone new, to begin a new chapter in your life, to find new friends, all scared me, only because I had never truly experienced what it was like to be cared for, to be held in comfort and re-assurance that everything was going to be ok-- because I didn't have that, I only had the constant doubt and pity of everyone who did not talk to me, or simply did not even bother knowing my name.
I envied pity, it disgusted me when people would apologize for something they do not know of, it lets me know that they know of the situation, yet,
they never talk to me, or about it.

That same day, was when I met the girl, Aria.
At first, this girl didn't bother me too much. However it angered me that she saved me out of pity, or maybe because she couldn't watch someone die at a public place, where tons of people surround it.
I thought she would leave, after she knew I was alive, but she had proven me wrong.
Terribly wrong for that matter, because she was the only one who would support me and come in to visit me, which made me happy to the point where I would question myself of what I did, for deserving such a sweet angel to look after me.

The open wounds, I had after my loss, were now closing.
Slowly but gently, it was a difficult process, but knowing she--
the most magnificent and sweetest person ever alive, a girl that made my heart ache from seeing how astonishing she is--
was by my side all the time, really impacted me. It impacted me to be a better person, to enjoy my life despite the way it has been, or how my life will be.

"In three words,
I can sum up everything
I've learned,
about life:
it goes on."

And indeed, it was true.
In a better life, in a life that is currently expecting me,
everything will continue going on.

But I am left, reminiscing the endless memories of my love, as I await her.
Memories that came in flooding like waterfalls.
beautifully, and vigourously.

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hii lovelies,
i have a very important question for you guys
do you like how i have been writing the chapters lately, or do you feel like i should change the style of writing?
also, should i continue doing these things at the end of every chapter? like little author notes i guess i would call them.
or just end the story without hearing from me?

please leave some feedback x i will totally appreciate it.

anyway, vote, like, and follow for more content :)
i will see all of you later

take careeee
xoxo