Closeted Double Life

Chapter Eleven

Wrinkles spread throughout Josiah's face that expressed a mixture between shock and confusion. I wanted to sprint out the door, and go, not to be found by Ben, Josiah or anyone; yet my legs felt as if there were super glued to the ground. Josiah and I stood there without movement. I could feel everyone staring at us. To lower suspecion I realized I needed to be out of my star of shock. I began to lift my arm in order to shake hands with Josiah, he seemed to follow my lead.

"Hey, I'm Mike. Nice to meet you." I forced out.

"I'm Josiah, nice to meet you too." Josiah managed to speak.

Once we were able to get through that the men and I had left Ben's place, and all went to the bar. Ben and I went together in my car. We both entered the car, started to make our way to the bar that everyone else was going to.

"Why were you so hesitant to introduce yourself to Josiah?" Ben asked breaking the silence.

"I don't know, I was waiting for him to say something." Avoiding the truth.

"Sorry about him, he's been different lately." Ben said quietly.

"Why is that?" I asked worried if I was being too nosey.

"Well recently he got engaged." He paused.

"That's good for him?" I said questionably.

"Yeah, but the thing is he's in love with someone else." He finished.

My heart stopped. "Well that's not good." I managed to say.

"I just hope everything turns out well for him." Ben said.

"Me too." I choked out.

We had parked the car out front of the bar where all the other men had arrived at. Entering the bar we all had to show our I.D's. Once finished that we had taken a seat at the bar where the men had ordered various types of beer and shots. I sat the lost in thought about how Josiah and I both learned something new about each other. I was stuck between intoxicating myself with alcohol to forget about my thoughts, or leave to be stuck with my thoughts. I made a choice and ordered a shot. After taking my second shot, I stood up to use the bathroom. Opening the door I find one other person in there washing his hands.

"Johnny?" Josiah asked.

"Yes?" I replied figuring there was no getting out of it.

"I hope you know we have a lot to talk about when we get home." He told me.

"There's really nothing to discuss, I'm in a relationship with Ben there's really nothing more to it." I replied.

"You're seventeen for crying out loud! You're underage!" Josiah exclaimed.

"Be quiet Josiah someone might hear you, and actually in New Jersey sixteen is the age of consent, so technically I'm legal."

"Just please stop, I'll see you when you get home. This isn't the end off this." Josiah said walking out of the door.

"We'll see about that." I mumbled under my breathe.

My legs started shaking I felt like I was going to be sick. I quickly walked out of the bathroom wanting to leave the bar. I took a seat next to Ben.

"Ben." I said getting his attention.

"What's up?" He replied.

"I don't feel good. Is it cool if I go back to your place? I'll pick you up when you want to leave." I said.

"Yeah sure, I'll leave now too. Can't leave my baby alone feeling ill." Ben replied.

"No, no I'll be fine just stay here enjoy yourself." I told him.

"Nonsense, I don't want to leave you by yourself." He persisted.

"Ben please just let me have a little alone time!" I said sounding harsher than I intended to.

"Oh, okay. Be safe." Is all Ben said before turning away from me.

My stomach turned a little with a bit of guilt for coming off harshly to Ben, but I wasn't in the mood to be loving and romantic. Returning back to Ben's apartment, i went straight to Ben's bed. The realization that Josiah knows about my relationship with Ben had hit me. Not only that, but now he knows about my attraction to men. What if he's homophobic? Is he going to tell my mom? What if Josiah tells Ben the truth about me, and Ben never wants to talk to me again? What if I get disowned for this? What if people from school find out, and my friends leave me for being attracted to men?

My head hurt from at the negative thoughts roaming through it. I went on my phone as a distraction. Checking my texts I saw some messages from my friends who I haven't answered, or really even talked to recently. None from Ben which was different, but there was a text from the same number as, Kerri, the girl I met at the bar. I opened the text to see what she wants now.

"Hey it's urgent! Text me as soon as possible!"

I felt even more pounding in my head. What could be so urgent? I hooked up with her once, two months ago, and she still won't leave me alone.

"What's so important?" I texted back.

Pacing back and forth, a cold sweat made its way down my neck, waiting for a reply. I hope she's just texting me to see if I'd respond. My phone vibrated in my pocket. I hurriedly pulled out my phone.

Kerri responded. As if my night couldn't get any worse, Kerri found a way.

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A.N

Wow finally an update. Sorry for keeping you guys waiting. I had this written for awhile, but I had no clue who to cast for Josiah so it's whoever this is. Thanks so reading!! Make sure to vote, comment, follow!