Ruining Your Heart.

Struggle Bus

She knew she looked like a fool. Standing there with her mouth agape after Mr. Handsome gave his usual speech of, "Hi, Welcome to Soft Fusion, my name is Ottie. How can I help you".

When she walked in here to wallow in self-pity she wasn't hoping to see a dream in stock black oil proof tennies. She wants to walk out and never look back, her antisocial side almost getting the best of her. She makes eye contact and sees her reflection in his deep cerulean eyes. She becomes intranced, so naturally she blurts out, "Uh, Savanna. Nice shoes." What the holy heck. I can't even SEE his shoes.

Ottie takes it in stride and gives a pearly sunshine smile. "Thanks, felt like making a statement. Black is the new black." She wants to run away as fast as she can because this is just too perfect. Blushing, she looks back at the menu and decides on a, "Triple Liquid Energy please."

Ottie seems to be taken back, but puts in the order any way. "4.50 Ms. Savanna." Just as she is about to hand the money over she drops it on the counter. Awesome. Fucking awesome job, hands. Way to make us look put together.

Shaking harder now she scrambles to pick the money back up. "Crap, sorry!" Ottie attempts to help by grabbing the quarter that's about to fall off of the counter and waits patiently for her to feel in control. "No worries." "Fou-four fif-fifty. Jesus."

Stifling a chuckle, Ottie gently manouvers the rest of the bill money out of Savanna's hands and tries to soothe her by attempting some rock solid small talk."Nice weather we're having. Do you like the cold or when its hot?"

"Mainly when it is about the feeling of normal Autumn. Definatley. My favorite time is just at the end of the second week of October when you can feel the change, you?" Savanna rambles getting lost in her daydream, gaining a wishful look on her face.

"I like the rogue days. The days in the middle of winter when its like 72° out, and you just get the tinglies, you know?" Ottie replies rythmicaly, as if he is lulling Savanna into slumber, and it almost works. Ottie is almost done making her heart attack in a cup, when the door bursts open. There is a beautiful young woman standing there looking like she just stepped out of a child's story book.

Her hair all wrapped up in golden ringlets that catch the light just so as she struts over to the small line that has formed behind Savanna. She is is the word godess personified; not at all like Savanna. There is an impatient huff that sounds behind Savanna. "Get out of the way, some of us actually have somewhere to be." Then another voice, mostly under their breath, sounds "She must be slow."

Hurt by the stranger's words she lowers her head and begins to beat herself down. I know. I am slow. No wonder why I can't keep my boyfriend happy. I can't even get a fricken order done in a timely manner. I should just go. I paid already, might as well just go. She turns ready to just leave and go home to deal with her boyfriend. As she approaches the door her eyes begin to tear up. She veers off sharply and sits back at her almost abandoned table, and begins to cry. I know if I go back now that he'll be with Her. Why even waste my time anymore. She looks again outside the window wistfully. She watches the lights turn on and off in the distant apartments and listends to the bustle of the coffee shop, trying to soothe her burning eyes before she has to face anyone.

"Savanna? Triple Liquid Energy on the counter." Announces a snarky dark headed boy whoseems to have appeared to take Otties place. Even scared him away. Awesome. Savanna approaches the counter and barely lifts her eyes to the white take away coffee cup to read her name in typical boy writting.

Grabbing her drink she heads back to her things and while she gets her items in order her thoughts go back to that dreaded place. That place where all roads lead to the same dead end. Where there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Where there is no way but to keep staring ahead into the seemigly endles void infront of you, and to keep going not knowing if you are going to smack into a wall that may or may not be only inches inforn of your face.

Savanna has her worn leather bag over her shoulder and her laptop in the opposite hand of her coffee with her lanyard of keys around her neck. The weight reminds her that she still has to face him. All of this and she still needs some one to say that she "did good".

Why? Why must she go back? Who would even notice if she never came back.

Reaching for the creepy germ infested handle she lets out a well deserved tear, accompanied by a river of the same right behind.

"Excuse me, Savanna?" A soft melodic voice asks from behind her.

~~~~~~~Thoughts? Comments? Votes? All appreciated~~~~~~~