Still - h.s (au)

Chapter 6

Grace

"This arrived for you." Martha hands me a letter in the middle of our break while having lunch in the small canteen of the hospital. We were having quite a late lunch as it was now 2 pm, but this was the only time we found to get our meal. Now, most of the soldiers were full of this delicious meat and vegetable roast and they were all sleepy. This time and throughout the night were the calmest moments in here, and they were my favourites as well.

I finally take a look at the envelope and feel a little upset when it is not from my parents, but from Calvin. I take a deep breath before opening it, seeing his perfect handwriting right away.

Dear Grace,

I hope you are well.

I was hoping that you would find time to visit me during your free afternoon last week, but I was utterly disappointed when you did not. And since you don't find time to visit your boyfriend, I will be paying you a visit during the next week. It is not acceptable that you cannot find time to meet with me.

Maybe after my visit, you will rethink this whole situation a little and give up on this stupid wish of yours to become a nurse. You are being selfish, your family is suffering deeply, and so am I.

I love you with all my heart and only say this because I care for you.

I see you very soon,

Truly yours,

Calvin Chapman.

How does he have the courage to write a letter like this to me? How does he dare to treat me in such a way? Does he think that I am his property and that he has the power to make decisions for me? Well, he does not.

And that is the exact reason why I am here and not at home folding socks and knitting sweaters.

And why I will never go back to that life.

Don't get me wrong, I had the most privileged childhood. I was able to access higher-end education, something that is not available to everyone, much less to women. But my parents wanted me to be the most educated as I possibly could. And that's why they were so upset that I didn't pursue a course to become a teacher. This war had many bad things, but it allowed us, women, to be in charge of our own faith. Most of the jobs done by men now had to be done by women, who were as capable as they are. After this war, nothing will ever be the same.

"What happened? You look as if you were about to kill someone." Martha probably notices how furious I am at this moment. I'm actually glad Calvin said this through a letter because if had told me this in person I would have lost my temper.

"Read." I hand her the letter and I only have to wait two minutes for her to finish the short but harsh letter. Her facial expression similar to mine after I read it.

"I know that this is none of my business, but what do you see in him? He sounds like those men from medieval times." Martha asks and I don't have an answer for her. I never felt attracted to Calvin, we were only friends and did not see him any other way. But after my brother died earlier this year, he got closer to me and my family and I think he misinterpreted my feelings for him. Because one day he had already asked my father if he could take me out on a date.

And after that, I didn't have the courage to say no to him. He took me out three times to the movies before asking again my father if he allowed us to go steady in our relationship. I was never asked about what I wanted, and for a while, it didn't bother me. But now it does, and I can almost feel my blood boiling with his words.

Calvin was a good match for me, rich and ambitious, and I would have a comfortable life next to him. But that is not what I am looking for, I am looking for something more, something that would make my heart race. And Calvin does not have that effect on me.