The name is Ricky

Chapter 4

*2 months later*
Ricky's pov.
I was out of the hospital since a month and I was doing better. I was in rehab and missed home. The guys didn't want anything to do with me and I felt lonely. Simon came to visit me at least twice a week. It felt like prison here. I couldn't wait to get out of here. People here looked weird at me because I didn't have anything to cover the scar. When Si last came he said that he would look for something. Today was the day he would come again. I was sitting in my room, reading a book. Waiting for someone to come in and take me to the meeting room. Like I said. It was like prison. I try to read another page but it isn't working anymore. Just as I put the book away there is a knock on the door. "Mr Wilson, you have a visitor." the woman says. I wish they would stop with saying Mr Wilson to me, the name is Ricky. But I follow her. She guides me to the meeting room and I sit down at a table. A few seconds later another door opens and Si comes in and he has a plastic bag full of stuff with him. I stand up and hug him. He hugs back. "How are you doing?" He asks me when we are sitting again. "I'm fine. Did you find anything?" I ask back. "Yess." he says and pulls some things out of the bag. 3 long sleeve shirts. "They should be long enough." Si says and I nod. "But I found another thing." I look at him with a curious look. He looks in the bag and pulls a ribbon out. "Here, you can put in around your wrist multiple times so that you won't see anything." Si says. I nod and stretch my arm so that he can tie is around my wrist. When he is done a nurse comes in and says that he has to go. "Why? Is this fucking prison or so? I just want to know how he is doing yeah?" Si says and she turns around again. "But yeah, you look better." he says to me. I look at my hands, not knowing what to say to that. "When can I get out of here?" I ask and look up. "I honestly don't know Ricky." "Why can't I just go. I won't do it again. I'll find help. I don't want to loose the band. Why would I do that? You guys are everything to me." I say to Si. The air catches my words and traps them. To never let go again. But Si has heard them, and he will ask someone. I just can't. "Have the guys changed their minds yet?" I ask. "Vijay wants you back, but peanut and whitey still say no." I lower my head. They will never take me back. And I'll be trapped in here. I stand up and walk back. "Rick. Come on. You know they will change their minds." Si says but I'm already out of the room. The door falls close behind me and I hold the shirts close to me. They give me a feeling of safety. They feel like home. Well, they are mine anyway, so that could be right. When I'm back in my room I change clothes and then read a book. I feel bad for not saying bye to Simon, because he can't help it. But I was just mad and he was the one who was there. I focus on the book and drift of into an imaginary world.