Date Night Stories

Following You

I always thought the moon was following me. As I sit on the passenger side of our family car, I'd have my face pressed on the glass looking at the moon as it would hide behind tall houses and appear brightly above the short ones. I would stare at it the entire time because it followed us during our whole car ride. I wonder why the moon, as mighty as it is, decided to follow us where he can't come along. I just know that the moon will stay up in the sky and be replaced by the sun in the morning.

The sun wasn't as silent. It was loud as can be. It made sure that you know it was around. The sun always followed me but I never could stare at it because it hurts to do so. The sun brought many beautiful things upon arrival, it brought sunlight to the plants and light in our lives throughout the day. The sun had its peaceful moments, right as it rises and right as it sets.

The sun had a beautiful way of appearing and disappearing. It always allows you to see it right before it rises, in between mountains and it sets as if it's going underwater, leaving behind a beautiful sky that changes into different colors. I have a love hate relationship with the sun. Because when it rises, I can't help but think about the day I have to face but when it sets, I can't help but feel sad that the day is over.

I thought if I go behind the mountains, I would know and see where the sun goes to sleep. Try to get more out of the day, try to be as busy as can be and use the sunlight as an excuse to work some more. Because once night falls, I know I have to go home. Home to the four walls that we built together. The four walls that kept me safe and dry from the rain that beat down the roof. It's been 5 years now, I still search for more sunlight, more sunshine to extend my days.

I keep searching and trying to find it, but I can't. It's been years, but I still have the same amount of hours in a day. I'm 28 now, I know why the moon follows the car every time. The moon wasn't lonely. It was keeping me company as I drove home. I still think the moon is as mighty as can be. Because it still follows me even though it doesn't have to. The nights seemed longer every day. To the point, I got used to the company of the moon.

Sometimes I would stand at the balcony where we used to dance to our favorite songs, I would stare at the moon and if I get lucky, the stars would appear. I still remember the smell collar as I embrace you at the end of a long day. I can still remember how perfectly your hands fit mine. I used to blame the sun for disappearing so soon. I used to blame the sun for being so difficult to find. But I know it isn't the sun's fault.

Just like it wasn't your fault that you had to leave too soon. I didn't have it all planned out when you left. I thought we were going to grow old together, just like the paradise we used to dream about. For years, I kept trying to reach for you. But I can't. I couldn't. I always fell short and I can never quite reach you. I wanted the days to last longer, so that I never have to come home to the empty house we made together. The echos of my footsteps and the emptiness of the seat beside me makes me feel so cold and alone.

I can't blame you for being gone too soon. You didn't want to go either. I know you're beside me as I go to sleep. You promised me you were never going to leave and I know you always kept your word. Even after death, and even though I still search for more sunlight, to avoid coming home, I know you're waiting for me.

You, just like the sun, had a beautiful way of appearing and disappearing. Even though it was painful having you disappear so suddenly, I can never forget how you appeared in my life so beautifully. Your eyes that could show me your entire soul and you smile that captivated my heart from the very beginning. You have always been so beautiful in your own way. I was lucky I get to spend many wonderful years with you. I was lucky I get to love you. You brought light into my life. And maybe when you disappeared, I tried to find enough light to replace what I lost.

I want to stop searching, but it's been 5 years and I still can't let you go. It's been dark ever since you left. And I miss you so much..