Evergreen Everleigh - The Wattys 2020

Chapter Thirty-Two - For All the Stars

Chapter Thirty-Two

For All the Stars

I pick at a scab on my neck restlessly as I lie in bed. The room is filled with the sounds of easy sleepers and fitful dreams, judging by the tossing and turning of Aloe's bed. A sliver of light slips in through the curtain over Willow's bed and casts a long shadow that touches the end of my bed, illuminating the tips of my toes. 

For me, dreaming had always been easy, until recent years when my mind seemed to move too quickly to be swayed into sleep. The floor is cold when I step out of bed and pad towards the door. I wince at the creaking of the wooden floorboards and pray that Violet and Juniper sleep on. 

Out in the hall, moonlight has decorated the walls in strips. I consider making a cup of tea and even momentarily I wonder about a slice of toast as I look out the window. The front of the house is magnificent at nighttime. Daylight does not do the acres justice. 

How Henry and Harmony would love to play here. It was made for their favorite games. Games I had taught them; hide and seek, what time is it mister wolf... If she had the chance, if she recovered, maybe she would teach them sardines...

"Can't sleep?" 

I turn, half expecting to see Yarrow. He seems like the type that would never truly need rest. Instead, Wister stands in the doorway of the kitchen a book in one hand and a glass of milk in the other. 

"No," I shrug. "Nice pajamas," I comment, raising an eyebrow. 

Wister, as always, appears tremendously sensibly in a checkered dressing gown, covering pin-striped pajamas. It was his slippers that made me laugh. They looked knitted, bright pink and adorned with equally knitted googly eyes. 

"Yarrow's birthday present to me, last year." He explains, joining me at the window. 

We watch the midnight birds flit about in silence for a long moment. 

"Anxious night?" Wister asks gently. I nod and grip the windowsill. 

I swallow hard. It had been both easier and harder, tremendously so, when her emotions had been buried so deeply. Now, my tears feel so close to the surface. 

"I miss them," I whisper. My heart beating louder with every breath.

Wister takes a sip of his glass of milk and smiles, a little sadly before pausing to think. 

"Come with me, if you wish," He says before turning an moving towards the stairs. 

Instinctually, I follow him onto the roof. 

The summer air is warm and kind against my arms. The stars wink and blink at us as we move towards the stable slabs on the roof. Wister rests his glass on the edge of the roof and moves into the greenhouse. He withdraws two sun chairs, the ones that tourists bring to the beach back home. 

"Are we whale watching? Where's your sun visor?" I ask, smiling slightly as I sit in one pastel blue chair. 

Wister tips his glass toward me. 

"You know, you've gotten funnier, Poppy?" 

"I did notice that actually. According to Cedar, I was appallingly morose." 

Wister looks up at the stars, his eyes wide with the possibility he always wears. 

"Most usually are, I'm afraid." 

I follow suit and look out at the stars. I don't think I have seen them so clearly, since my first night here. Perhaps, I'll read here in the future. Back in the city, at home, the stars never shine this brightly.

"There is a quote in your Jayne Ellis book that I love," Wister begins. "Stars live in my cells - in the dark or burning heat..."

"...They exist." I finish. I had come across that quote not long ago and loved it instantly. "I didn't know you read Jayne Ellis." 

"If I am correct, you didn't know who Jayne Ellis was before you came here." He mocks me, cheerfully. I stick out my tongue at him and look back at the stars. Wister takes another sip of milk before speaking again. "What do you suppose it means, to have stars in your cells?"

"I should have known this would be a teaching moment." I groan and Wister laughs. 

Picking at the sleeve of my jumper, I look at the ground rather than the stars. I try to think about his question and ignore that he already has the answer he hopes I'll get. 

"I suppose," I begin slowly. "That it might mean that there is more in us than our lives have to offer."

"More?" He probes, hopelessly enjoying that I am playing along with his unofficial counseling session. 

"More than our lives. Like we actually do have a higher purpose." I feel almost as silly as when I gave Sweet Pea her birthday present and gave her a reading. "Like my No-No used to say."

Actually, she said as much to me when I saw her after her own funeral, I think. I can't help but wonder how Wister would react if I had added that detail. Knowing the oddness of Wister, he likely wouldn't react at all. 

"Do you agree?" He asks.

I look from the stars to Wister. Just the sight of his face is enough for me to remember the painting in the rain, the endless hours spent talking on his office carpet, the games of sardines. 

"Yes." I found myself staying. "I agree." 

I half expect my grandmother to appear in front of me right there and then to tell me I told you so. 

We look at the stars again for a minute. Jayne Ellis' words swirl in my mind. The stars in my cells, no matter the brightness or the dark. 

As I look at the glittering sky, I ponder what a wonderous theory it is.

A/N

This is a short little snippet of a chapter, just something to keep the story moving and recovery-focused. Sometimes it's nice to slow things down and be much less 'action' based. I hope you enjoyed!

Jen xx