After Ever Marriage ...

Test of Faith

Hardin's POV
As the doctor finishes up examing Tessa, she tells us she thinks she knows what happened. She says it looks like Tessa's Placenta broke off and that's way she was bleeding. She is only 2 cm dilated, but because of all the bleeding, they need Tessa to stay in bed. The look on Tessa's face is crushed. Her birth plan she so perfectly planned out, is out the window now. They place a Catheter in her and leave the room for a few minutes.
"The baby is okay, that's all that matters" Tessa says to me with a weak smile.
"Honey, YOU are okay too. You matter to me, you are the reason I live everyday love" I tell her.
"Hardin, I'm not prepared. I have no plan to follow anymore. My back is in so much pain, my contractions are so far apart. This isn't how it was suppose to go" Tessa says while crying.
"Babe, it's okay. We've got this. Do you think you need your epidural for the back labor?" I ask.
"I think I do. But then I really can't do things my way" She sniffs.
"Tessa, Your body and Emery are the boss now. I'll go get the nurse" I tell her.
I find the nurse, and ask for the millionth time if they are going to be alright. The nurse gives me a tiny smile but says Tessa is losing so much blood and isn't dilated that they are worried she won't have enough energy to give birth on her own. Right now the baby is not in distress but when they baby does become stressed, a C section is probably what will take place for the both of them. I don't mean to start crying in front of this nurse, but I lose it. I don't want to lose my Tessa or Emery. She also said it looks like Tessa may need multiple blood transfusions afterwards. I tell her thank you for the information and go into a small waiting room and lose everything that I've been trying to be brave with. Just then my phone buzzes in my pocket.
"Hardin! It's Landon. I'm on my way now. What's going on? Is she okay? Is the baby ok?"
   I tell him everything they've told me while uncontrollably sobbing by myself in the waiting room. Just as I hang up with Landon, someone touches my shoulder. It's Tessa's Mother.
"Hardin, I went to swing by the bookstore and saw the sign said "emergency, had to close early" Is Tessa alright?" She asks me.
"I'm sorry I didn't call you. We were rushed to the hospital by ambulance. She's in room 120 if you want to see her." I tell her.
"Hardin, I know you and I have never been really close, but it looks like you need a hug. It looks like God is testing your Faith" She says to me. "Let's Pray  for a healthy strong Mama and Baby."
"Thanks but I don't really know how to pray, and I don't think God would listen to me" I mutter.
"Here, Let's do it together" She says as she grabs my hands.
    As we prayed for both Tessa and Baby Emery, I watched as she closes her eyes. This woman hated me from day one, and now she is helping me pray. I was overwhelmed by all of my emotions that I went for a walk while she went to see Tessa. Her Contractions are getting stronger but she still isn't dilating. As I come back into the room The Lab Tech is setting up her epidural.
"No! I'm not getting that until my husband is here" She stubbornly states.
"Babe, I'm right here. You can do this. Look into my eyes and take my hands" I whisper.
    She cries silently and her lower lip quivers as they place it in. She looks so worn out. She's now been laboring for 3 hours, but I have a feeling the worse is yet to come.

Tessa's POV
  This is not how things were suppose to go. I had everything planned out perfectly. I know Hardin is scared, heck I'm scared. I feel weak and tired. They told me to try and rest, but how am I suppose to rest when I have contractions. Hardin looks worn out. Landon is here, along with Karen and my Mother. It's my support team I guess you could call it. Karen and My Mother are sleeping in the small waiting room next to my room, and Landon just sent Hardin for more coffee for the both of them. It's perfect because I need to talk to Landon about something that's heavy on my heart.
"Landon, I need to talk to you about something. Please don't get upset, but I need to talk to you about if I should die." I whisper to him. His shocked face tells me he wasn't expecting this.
"Tessa, don't talk like that. These Doctors know what they are doing." He says
"I've overheard several nurses. I'm not stupid. This birth is not like one they've dealt with. I'm weak and they don't think natural labor is an option anymore. So if I go in for a C section, and I don't make it because of how much blood I've already lost, I need you to take care of Hardin as much as you can. I know he will be angry, but help him raise our daughter with love and kindness. Help him find someone to love again" I whisper as tears fall down my face. I can't imagine my Hardin loving anyone besides me, and I know that sounds selfish, but I want him to live life to the fullest with someone else if necessary.
"I promise Tessa. I will do everything I can" Landon says as tears start falling from the corner of his eyes.
"Hey What's going on guys? Why are you crying Tess?" Hardin says as he walks into the room with two jumbo coffees.
"Oh just the contractions Babe. They are getting stronger" I lie to Hardin.
   Just then the nurse comes in with the Doctor to see if I've dilated anymore. They've already given me Pitocin to try to speed things up.
"Well Tessa. I'm afraid there isn't much change at all. We need to start talking about a cesarean birth. The baby is doing okay, but her heart rate is changing which tells me she is becoming stressed. You can have one person with during the surgery. I want to get you in there as soon as possible. I will send in my nurses to get to prepped. You can say your goodbyes and all that now.
"This is it. Hardin are you ready?" Tessa asks in a scared whisper.
"I'm ready Tessa. I love you and you will be amazing in there. I just know it. I'll go grab your Mother and Karen for goodbyes before surgery" Hardin tells me.

Hardin's POV
And just like that my faith is being tested. We are doing this. As I go get her Mother and Karen I pray to God, "Please don't let anything bad happen to my Tessa, or baby daughter Emery. I'm begging you."