The Shadows Within Us | Grethan

5

ethan's point of view

"Alright. Let's go kick some fucking monster ass."

A smile came over my face at Grayson's words. He could really lighten the situation with anything he said. In fact, having Grayson here with me in a time like this really made me rethink my whole views on life itself. Before Grayson, I was living alone, in constant fear of dying alone. I didn't care about the dying part, but I cared about the alone part. I was never ever liked as a child, and I had to rely on the simple things around me to bring happiness to my cold heart. My father, an alcoholic that spend more time sipping whisky that spending time with me. My mother, a doctor that worked over 60 hours a week and was spending so much time at work and fucking the guy next door that she never made time for her own damn son. Priorities, right?

Everyone thought that everything was fine, when it was indeed not. I was suffering from loneliness and I knew from a young age, that I would forever be lonely. I would never find someone to spend the nights with, to cook dinner together, to watch the sun set on the back porch, to watch our kids have kids, but most of all, spend the rest of our lives together and be together our last dying breaths, laying in our bed, in our own damn home. Was I a hopeless romantic, or was I living a dream where everything was like The Notebook, I didn't know for sure. But the one thing I knew for sure was, that Grayson and I were going to kill the thing that was outside of my home. 

However, whatever happened after; if Grayson stayed, or he left, I didn't know that at all. But I hoped he stayed. I wanted Grayson to stay, in my cabin, in the middle of buttfuck nowhere, with me. And maybe, just maybe he would. But right now, we had other things to do that were more important than me hoping Grayson would stay in my cabin with me. "I'm ready." I said at last. The only words on my mind that could make sense in a moment like this. Grayson grinned, eyes shinning. "Do you still want to discuss that game plan? Or... are we saying "Fuck it" and just going for it?" Grayson asked as we walked out of my bedroom and back to the kitchen. 

The house was fucking freezing now, and the lanterns did nothing with warming up the place. While they were mostly used to light the place in the dark, they now became our only sense of heat. I took one them down from a spot in the wall, and rubbed my hands over the burning flame. Thankfully, the heat warmed my fingers just enough that they weren't freezing and close to falling off. "Game plan, for sure. But, I'm not part of the army whatsoever, so thinking of a way to attack this is coming right from a SY-FY movie I saw a few years ago." I mumbled. Grayson rose his brow, "How many 'few years' are we talking?" He questioned me, coming towards me to warm his hands as well. 

"Five. Give or take." I spoke, a strained smile on my face. It was definitely more than five, but I would let that be the only secret I kept from Grayson. "Five. Okay. We can work with that. Although I don't seem to be the one to do so, but I play video games from time to time. I took up the hobby after Alex was killed. I just thought that would you know..." Grayson trailed off. But I didn't have to say anything. I knew what he meant. I started smoking and drinking to get closer to my father, whether I wanted to admit it or not. It was the cold hard truth. 

"But, I did pay attention to what the geeks were talking about when we were shooting zombies. Something like, "Find cover and then go for the legs, and chest." It has been a few months since I played last, so, I might be a little rusty." Grayson finished, chuckling a bit. I too, was laughing. Here he goes again with making the situation lighter. "Hey, you were playing video games, gaining valuable knowledge while I was out here eating a squirrel! Just goes to show who really is into the trends." I said, grimacing at the remembrance of Ralph. But he was the last thing I had. It was the dead of winter and poor Ralph was the only thing around worth eating. No way in fuck am was I eating yellow snow.