The Disadvantages of Making a New Friend

Chapter 9

Kate 20th December, 2018;morning

So, as Mac was her parents' only child, there's no one else to take her love she had reserved for her daughter. So sometimes, I have to be there for it. Also, she's having some problems dealing with, umm, the entire world. So, I often accompany her whenever I'm free. Sometimes I stay with Mrs. Fanning to prevent her from doing something stupid. It's not visible to everyone, her problems. She still can chat with people in a friendly way. Only we get it, the people she's close to; that something's going on. It's like that you can discuss stuff with her very normally for for almost a hour; and then she'll suddenly blurt out something crazy or some horrific idea. My dad suggested Mr. Fanning to appoint her with a therapist. But Mrs. Fanning never liked the idea. Also, I think it's pretty normal. She lost her only child only a month ago. She just needs some time to get over her mourning period. "She'll be alright," mom said. "She'll get used to it. Old and young; all people face unexpected death. Even cancer patients hope to get well until the last moment. That's life." Mom added, "Isn't she like 39? She can even try for another kid. There's still time."So, Mrs. Fanning seemed a little ill when we were passing Ian's house on our way to the grocery store. "Hey, let's knock that door. Let's meet the Dobrevs. I haven't met them since, you know, that thing." She whispered into my ears. I knew Ian's parents weren't home. And it got really hard for Ian to stay at college dorm after all those things happened, so he moved back in his house and attended college from here. When I told her about that, she said, "Okay, then; I want to meet Ian. There have been some misunderstandings. I trust the police here. When they didn't find anything to charge with, I'm sure Ian didn't do it. I just want to let everyone know about it." She said. Well, the idea seemed a little too nice to say no to.

So, here I am, knocking at the door. Ian opens it even before I've finished knocking. He looks surprised, appearing in the doorway, looming in front of me, filling the space. "Kate? Mrs. Fanning?" he asks, looking down at me, trying hard to bring a friendly smile. "I just need to let you know that I don't hold any grudge against you. Because I don't think that you killed my daughter." Mrs. Fanning says. "I just miss my little baby, you know. I want to hear your stories with her. I just need to hear about the times she was happy." I notice Ian's confused face for a second but he hides it and gestures for us enter the house. "I was expecting someone else," he says. "Kendall called me a few minutes ago. She says that she's going to say something. She's coming here."

Kendall 20th December, 2018;morning

So, I want to get him back. My gorgeous and beautiful Ian. That's why I called him earlier.

I lied to the police about my feelings for Ian. I never felt like that before. I liked those guys; I liked to hang out with them, showing off their cute looks. Dating was just fun. But when I met him, everything changed. I actually started to believe in those clichés. The quotes about love. I never cared about my beau's well being or stuff like that. Whenever I saw someone like that, I was like- Do people actually feel like that? Or they just copy the romantic movie characters? I wanted to be with a guy forever, for the first time. I was the first woman in his life. If you think like that, he's the first guy I've ever loved too. I felt SO lucky to have him and I wanted to make him the happiest man in the world. Only after five months of dating, I had this tattoo near my collarbones, which spelled 'Ian'. I showed it to him; and I sensed that he kind of freaked out in spite of his efforts to hide it. So I never showed him the other one, the tattoo of the tiny pair of shiny blue eyes with locks of blond hair falling over them. That tattoo was on my left thigh, a little above my third tattoo, which spelled 'Amy'. I wanted to see if she was okay with it. She wasn't, so I just played it as a prank. I liked pranks. I often did them just to have fun. Since my childhood, I've always known there's something different about me. My behavior seemed too odd to other people sometimes. Now I've learnt to deal with it. Often I told that that was a prank.

Amy's a good friend. I share a lot of things with her. Well, not everything. I would, but she's still just a friend. I wanted to be her blood sister, so that I could share my every secret with her. I cut my hand and took out some blood. But she freaked out when she heard it. So she knows me better than my other friends, but still it's a bit different than the real me. She knows that I don't like sharing, that I think my things are just mine. But she didn't how not-sharing I was. I don't like it when other people enjoy my favorite song. My favorite movie. My favorite book. That's MY song. MY movie. MY book. Only I get to enjoy it.

I told Amy that story about that thing happened when I was 11. I was very close with one of my cousins. She used come to our house almost every day. But then her parents got her a cat. She liked to play with it so much; that she started to lose interest in spending time with me. Then the unexpected amazing thing happened. The cat got out of the house and never came back. I got my cousin back. But my mom sensed something. After their repeated questions, I had to admit that I left the kitten in the middle of the woods nearby because I was jealous. My parents were worried about me for being so possessive. They took me to therapists. I had to take prescribed drugs to control my emotions. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't. Actually I liked being different.

I was a lot normal when my parents moved here, in LA. I was 14 and started my new life in high school here. Girls didn't want to be friends with me before LA. So I perfectly hid that part of myself, and people liked 'freak' me even more those normal ones. I didn't show my anger directly when someone liked my favorite song. I just had to call it lame. I learnt it real good how to protect all that's mine without being hated.

But then Ian broke up with me, I thought that he just needed some space for while. That didn't hurt me, because I was sure of that-he'd crawl back to me in no time. Besides, it's really hard to be stuck with one boyfriend for eight months. So, I thought that I could make a good use of this time. I was gonna dump Ray the minute Ian came back.

So, of course I couldn't tolerate when I first saw Mac and Ian holding hands. I felt a burning pain in my hands. And in my chest, too. I hated even when any girl hit on my celebrity crush Nick Robinson. And that's Ian. My Ian. My loving and caring Ian. My sweet dreams at night. So I got furious and told those things to Mac. Turns out, she never knew about me. I liked every little change at her facial expressions. When she got murdered, police suspected me. It wasn't illogical, if they knew about the possessive me. Anyway, she's dead now, and I am going to win him back.