A Week With Ray Summers

Ten

 It was my last day with Ray. I’d spent the whole day after she busked trying not to stare at her, but it was getting harder and harder to stop thinking of her. That night, I lay in bed with Jamie, and knew I didn’t want to be there anymore. Once upon a time, I’d craved his presence. I’d longed for him to come home in the evenings. I’d longed for him to kiss me and trace my hips with his fingers. But somewhere along the line, we’d lost the spark. Everything that was once new and exciting became stale and familiar. Maybe it’s me. Maybe long term relationships don’t work for me. But I just didn’t feel the need to draw out our relationship. Not anymore. Not when Ray’s hips and lips and eyes were constantly on my mind. Not when I thought of what could have happened if Jamie hadn’t rung two days before. The way I saw it, Jamie and me weren’t working anymore. Not just because of how Ray had changed me, but because he himself had changed.

 I made him breakfast, as always. He was punctual, as always, coming downstairs at seven sharp. I placed a plate of eggy bread in front of him and he dug in right away. As though nothing had happened between us those past few days.

 “This is nice, Frey,” he said. I leant against the kitchen counter awkwardly. My hands were shaking.

 “Good,” I replied stiffly.

  He smiled at me angelically “I’m so glad we’re back to normal now,” he said.

 “Jamie, I-”

 “It’s been an awful few days. Without you. I missed you.”

 “Look, Jamie, I just need to-”

 “What is it?” Jamie was smiling. He didn’t seem to sense what I was about to do.

 “I just…I just…” I made the mistake of looking at Jamie. He was smiling so sweetly, his blue eyes wide and the corners of his lips stretched out in a huge grin. I took one look at how happy he was and couldn’t do it.

 “I just wanted to say I’m happy too,” I said. Jamie smiled.

 “Come here,” he whispered. When I didn’t move, he stood and took my hips in his hands, dragging me into him. His lips pressed to mine and his hand began exploring my body. He pulled away, eyebrows raised.

 “You’ll be late,” I said quietly.

 “So what?” he murmured. Then, for the second time, I went to bed with Jamie and wished it was Ray.

***

 I was quiet all day, and I think Ray noticed it. We were just having a day in, watching films and snacking, but normally, we’d talk all the way through, predicting the plot and who would be killed off next. But I had other things on my mind. I was concentrating hard on how close Ray was sat to me. She’d draped a blanket over our legs, and we were almost touching. I could feel the heat of her. As the day drew on, I found that we’d got closer. Like some magnetism was drawing us slowly together. Ray’s arm lazily rested on the back of the couch and I rested my head against her shoulder. The whole time, though, I felt ridiculously guilty.

 “Let’s go out somewhere,” Ray declared “Get drunk. Liven you up a bit.”

  I was about to protest, saying I needed to get home for Jamie. But I didn’t. Even if you can’t have Ray, it doesn’t mean you can’t spend a night with her I thought to myself. I forced a smile, still feeling guilty.

 “OK,” I said “Let’s do it.”

 “Help me pick out an outfit, then. You know more about fashion than me,” Ray said. We headed upstairs and Ray slid open her wardrobe, revealing the hordes of clothing she owned. I stepped into the wardrobe and sifted through the clothes, picking out a black dress that clung to her curvy body. It dipped down at the front, revealing a lot of cleavage, and the slits in the sides exposed her pale skin. I wanted to touch it, kiss it. I was wild with lust.