Alycia | Away (part 1)

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by loverbaesam9

by loverbaesam9

Alycia and you had been arguing again, this time it was worse than ever before.
   She was going to be away for an extra few months, longer than usual. That wasn't the problem. The problem was, she didn't tell you.
   She said that she didn't want you to worry, it would be over before you knew it, it wouldn't be much longer.
   That didn't matter.
   You argued with her about it because she knew, weeks before, months before but she didn't tell you.
   When she finally returned home, she got back from the airport (her usual method of getting a ride from a taxi or her manager's team) and got back home to you. She acted like nothing was wrong.
   "I'm sorry, i didn't think you would care so much." Alycia shouted back to you.
   "Of course I care, I always have." You replied
   "I miss you so much when you're away but you don't give a shit."
   "Yes I do, I care so much. You don't think I don't miss you. I didn't want to stay longer but I had to."
   "You could have told me."
   "I thought you would freak out. Clearly that back fired."
   "I'm going." You shouted back, leaving Alycia standing there shocked.
   "Don't go." Alycia walked towards you and took hold of your hand.
   "I need time to breath and think."
   "Please, just stay." Alycia shouted back. "We can sort this. I'm sorry."
   "Stop it. I'll be back soon." You spoke to her, calming your voice slightly before opening the door and leaving through it. You didn't slam it shut. That wasn't you.

———

   You went to the small memorial park near your house.
   Thinking about what had happened made everything worse; you had to do it though.
   Yes, the fight was stupid but Alycia was gone for 5+ months at a time and often twice a year. Seeing her for the time you got was a blessing but as was the relationship. It was a blessing and a curse.
   You really did love her. It was amazing when the two of you were together but horrible when apart. She said at the start of the relationship that this is what it would be like but you both thought it would be okay.
   You knew this is how it would be, time away from each other a lot, long distance, lots of calls and video chatting. This wasn't what you expected though. You thought there was some trust between you two and honesty but it broke your heart when she didn't come home when she originally told you.

Beep

Your phones beeped in your jacket pocket. As you slowly pulled it out of the pocket, you saw a message notification,

Leesh 💕
Please can we talk. X

You wanted to respond straight away but a different part of you wanted to make her wait.

Y/N
I just wanted the truth.

Leesh 💕
I'm sorry. Please can I explain.

Y/N
I'll be back soon. Give me time to think.

You stood up and thought for a moment. Do I go back now or wait? You decided for the first option.

As you eventually approached the house, you pondered before going inside.

Alycia was sat on a chair in the living room by as soon as she heard the sound of the door shutting behind you, she bolted up and walked towards you.

Neither of you said anything, but after a few moments Alycia looked at you and began to speak. "Can we talk?"

You nodded and started to walk to the sofa where Alycia sat after you.

She looked at you before speaking again.
"I'm sorry. I should have told you. It's my fault and I don't know what to do."

"Why didn't you tell me? Why wait? How long did you know before you told me?"

"I didn't know how to tell you, how you would react, if we would break up over it."

"How long, Ally?"

"A few weeks." Alycia looked down to her hands. You caught a glimpse of tears forming in her eyes. You hated to see her like this. "I'm so sorry."

"Hey, listen." You spoke, "I love you."

Alycia glances up to you.

You continued, "I love you. I just don't understand. We wouldn't have broken up over it, really. I just wanted to know. I know what this means to you, acting. I know how much you hate long times away from family and friends but you could have told me. I just- hate this."

"I love you too. That's why. I thought maybe it would be the last straw. Longer away. You would want to end the relationship because of it. I hate being away from you but if I told you I thought maybe it would be it for us. I don't want that. Ever."

"I'm sorry." You spoke. "What made you think that?"

"You said it. A while ago."

"What?"

"You said, you hate being this far away, you said you hated it so much you didn't think you could do this anymore."

"Alycia, I didn't mean that. I love you. Yes, I hate you being away but when you're back, I feel- I feel so much happier and so much more loved than ever."

Alycia couldn't stand the distance. Neither of you could but being together eventually was worth it.