All We Leave Behind

All We Leave Behind - Chapter Five

Five

“Why isn’t the doctor coming?” Sarah was looking around the emergency room anxiously, her eyes darting, searching for a physician. I felt my heart pounding rapidly, the fear was mounting. Hell it had already mounted, I was terrified. “Is there any way I can reach your family, your sister?” It was more of a plea from Sarah. She wanted something to do, to feel like she was helping. I glanced at the hands on the big round white clock in the waiting room.

“It’s nine twenty. My sister should be at the funeral home till ten.”

“Ok, ok I’ll go!” She seemed happy she had something to do, a way to help. “Are you going to be ok?”

“Who knows?” I chuckled but she frowned at my joke. “I’ll be fine.” She accepted that answer and headed out the door but in truth, I was feeling groggy and light headed. Another chill ran through my body. It reminded me of when I was sick with the flu as a child.

My mother was at my bed, I was only six.

“Open wide John.” I opened my mouth and she placed the thermometer under my tongue. “You have to keep it under your tongue and don’t open your mouth.” I nodded. “It’s not easy being sick is it dear?” I shook my head. “Well you’re a brave young man you are.” I smiled a little making it harder to keep the thermometer balanced under my tongue. “Don’t smile too much or it may escape your tongue.” My mother’s warm smile, I never knew how much I’d miss it.

“Hi I’m Dr. Daniel, how are you feeling?” A man in a white physician’s coat with curly blond hair and glasses had approached me with a clipboard in hand. He immediately began to check my blood pressure.

“Been better, I thought I was going to die before someone saw me.” I was feeling a little drunk, silly and out of it. Maybe this is how you feel when you bleed to death so you can’t fixate on the horror of what is happening.

“Don’t worry we won’t let that happen to you.” He smiled but it faded as he considered the results of my blood pressure. He immediately spoke to the nurse at the desk and then came back.

“We’re going to get you some blood in a moment but while we are waiting for that I just want to double check that you have no history of ulcers.”

“Not that I’m aware of.”

“But you do have a history of stomach pain correct?”

“Yes last year or two.”

“Alright.”  A man approached pushing a gurney. “Brent here is one of our best nurses he’s going to fix you up with some blood to help replace what you’re losing and we are going to work on stopping the bleeding. If you feel like you’re going to faint, you need to let Brent know right away ok?” I nodded. I wondered if I should tell them I felt dizzy. I’d never fainted before, so I was unsure what warning I would have, what signs to look for. Daniel left, leaving Brent to insert the intravenous.

“There you go.” He said when it was done. “Think you can stand?”

“Sure.” I went to get up and began to wobble a little. My vision seemed to come in two narrow points. “I think I might be fainting.” He had a firm grip on my arm to help balance me.

“Sit back down if you need to.” My vision had returned.

“No I’m ok I think.” With his help I managed to get onto the gurney. He wheeled me into the back. Everything had become foggy. I threw up a few more times. It was very difficult to keep count everything was hazy. Four people surrounded me now.