Chapter 17: Kiss

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             Our lips collide, her arms tightening around my neck as I pull her waist in closer to mine not wanting even a centimeter of space between us. Her soft lips move in sync with mine and I get lost in this kiss I have been wanting for weeks, it was everything and more than I imagined incredibly special. I felt a spark that I had never felt in a kiss before and I knew for a fact, she was my soul mate. Pulling back she puts her hands on my chest, I open my eyes and see her face full of regret and my heart shatters. “Oh my gosh, I just kissed a married man!” She nearly screams taking a few steps away from me,

           “Jazmine, please calm down seriously. Sam and I have been in a loveless marriage for years…” I try to assure her but I could see it in her eyes that mentioning Sam’s name was the wrong move, she shakes her head frantically tears streaming down her cheeks and the bits and pieces of my heart cut the inside of me.

         “No, Randy, this is wrong. You can put whatever spin on it you want but it doesn’t change the fact that this is wrong!”

         “If loving you is wrong then damn it I don’t want to be right!” I scream throwing my hands in the air, I can’t hide it anymore I need to be with Jazmine I can’t deny my love for her after that kiss.

          “I think I love you too…but what if this is lust, a mistake? We need time apart, to figure out if this is real…even then I just don’t think I can be with a divorced man…” she whispers in a low voice staring at the ground not daring meet my hurt gaze at her.

         “Even if you love me and we were meant to be you wouldn’t be with me because I married someone once before you?” I ask in a shaky voice praying she doesn’t mean it, there is no way God would bring me to my soul mate just to rip her away.

           “You don’t understand…just trust me…can you please take me home.” She sniffles wiping her cheeks, I glance over my shoulder and see the band member’s staring at us intensely they look the other way pretending like they weren’t just ease dropping.

           I pull into her driveway and immediately she pulls the door open trying to step out I catch her hand just in time. “Jaz, please don’t do this…I can’t just not talk with you…” I fight back tears at her stern look, I knew it was hurting her too but she wasn’t going to change her mind.

          “I’m sorry…” she whispers before pulling her hand from my grip and running inside, tears slide down my cheeks as I hit my steering wheel. Anger rises in me as I try to find someone other than us to blame, I put the car in reverse and fly out of her neighbor knowing exactly who to blame.

        I bang on the door as hard as I can, neighbors stick their heads out trying to see what the commotions all about but I glare at them and they quickly go back in their rooms and close the doors. “John!” I yell banging my fist harder,

        “What?” John says as the door swings open, “Do you fucking know what time it is and your banging on my door like you’re the cops.”

           “This is all your fault!” I yell as I push past him and walk into the hotel room,

           “What is?”

          “Jazmine want’s time apart…” I sigh then remember I’m here because it’s his fault, “You jinxed everything, tonight would have gone perfect if it wasn’t for you!”

        “Randy, I’m sorry that you are hurting right now, but don’t you dare stand there blaming me. I didn’t go to that girl and say you need to stop you are ruining his life! No I pulled YOU to the side and told YOU that you were ruining your own life, losing your family and risking everything you’ve worked for your entire life!” He screamed and my insides aching knowing that he is right, he could have went to her but he didn’t.

              “….I’m sorry.” I groan, hating to apologize “I know you are right, it’s just…I kissed her tonight. I can’t be without her John, she is my soul mate I know it.”

            “Fuck…” he sighs knowing that there is no turning back now, “Bro I say this out of love so don’t get pissed but you are too old for her. That girl is beautiful no doubt, she is charming and all but she is just that a girl…you are a man. Seriously when she is 30 you will be 42 years old, just let it go…” I stare at him trying to control the anger within,

             “This isn’t about age…you can’t help who you love. You divorced Liz and got with Cheyenne so why can’t I divorce Sam and get with Jazmine?”

             “That isn’t the same thing, Liz wanted the divorce and I found Cheyenne a year later. I didn’t divorce Liz for Cheyenne.”

            “Forget it you wouldn’t understand, no one will understand, ever.” I turn to leave against his objections, “Imagine if you went home and Cheyenne was gone, no phone calls no nothing… when you can do that then come talk with me.” I say plainly over my shoulder, pain appears in his eyes as a tear slides down my cheek and I walk out the door.

           Sitting in the driveway to my house, I text Jazmine in my car hoping she will reply. “Jaz, you can’t ignore me forever… and if you can please don’t. I need you…” I hit send crawling into the back seat not wanting to deal with my loud ass floors and fall into a deep sleep hoping to dream of Jazmine.

Things didn't go as planned and I apologize about that D: Please bare with me in posting though I am almost finished there will only be 23 chapters to this story so the ending is quickly approaching :)) 

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